"When Maw got the axe, it done made me cry.
But, now she's jist makin' me drool!"

* * *

"There is nothing more important than family.
Please. Taste mine."

* * *

"Grandmother got her wish to be cremated.
But I pulled her out while she was still nice and moist."

* * *

"My wife wouldn't get off her lazy ass for nuthin'.
And that's how I know she's melt-in-your-mouth tender!
YEEHAW!"

* * *

"I just squeezed this out,
so it's still a little warm."

* * *