I like hot girls with big bouncy racks. And I hate musicals. That being said, I do enjoy a dash of cinnamon in my morning coffee. I find it delightful!

This morning at Starbucks I sprinkled in a little cinnamon and caught a whiff of something awful-- NUTMEG. Someone there had accidently filled the cinnamon shaker with the very wrong stuff.

Is there really a need for nutmeg to be one of the staple shakers at the Starbucks fixin's bar? Short of eggnog (where I don't mind it), I don't know why it's a featured player. There's Vanilla Powder, Chocolate Powder, Cinnamon, and Nutmeg. I'll let you guess which one is the Ringo in that band.

It reminds me of the time my mother tried to kill me with a jellybean. She had a dish of them out and I popped an orange one in my mouth. A moment later my tastebuds were attacked with an explosion of nasty cloves. CLOVES!

"Oh, those are spice jellybeans," she said.

"Oh, what the fuck for?!" I said - in my head. (It's not nice to say fuck to your mommy, even when she loses her mind and buys spice jellybeans like a loon. But feel free to think it.)

I'm sure I'm going to get a bunch of emails now from nutmeg lovers and clove jellybean fans. If you must write, go ahead. It'll take awhile for me to answer though. I'm still writing back to all the nice English and Canadian people who proudly enjoy their U's in words like flavour. :)