March 06, 2004


Here's another little goodie from the old Stet archives. (This was originally written a few years ago, and sadly, I don't think this product is around anymore. As you will see, that is a true shame...)

We at Stet would like to salute the fine folks at Baskin Robbins for their amazing kids' treat-- "The Radical Blast." The fluorescent neon-colored shakes are available in sour apple, fruit punch and blue raspberry. Once we were able to pull ourselves away from the pretty colors, we came across a friendly little flyer out on the counter.

The flyer says, among other things, that "The syrup colors used safely pass through a person's digestive system." Which means the Radical Blast also passes Stet's strict food purity laws.

And it only gets better from here. Now we don't know if this was a legal precaution or an ingenius marketing move, but the happy green flyer goes on to say "After digesting the beverage, some consumers may notice a slight discoloration of their stool." Nice! Now that's a radical blast indeed. Not only can you show your friends your brightly colored tongue, but you can indulge in a new form of self expression hours later!

We can't help but wonder why this phenomenal selling point is being wasted on a little flyer? It should say "RADICAL BLAST: IT'S EVEN MORE FUN AFTER YOU EAT IT." Or an entire advertising campaign complete with the tagline "RADICAL BLAST: Let Your Crapper Be Your Canvas!"

Coincidentally, while slugging back some Pepto Bismol after a recent Rad-Blast binge, we were delighted to read on the bright pink bottle that in addition to relieving indigestion: "This beneficial medication may cause a temporary and harmless darkening of the tongue or stool." So while the Blast comes in three flavors, by no means are you limited to the 3 colors pictured above. Simply follow some of the suggestions in our handy color mixing chart and let your inner artist come out.

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Posted by Steven | Archive
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