January 31, 2008

It Doesn't Seem Fair

(Learning how to spell "Fergalicious" may be the first step to becoming it.)

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Posted by Steven | Archive

It seems unfair to make up a descriptive term that can only be used for one person, like Hitler-tastic.

Posted by: will at January 31, 2008 10:40 AM

Don't you think that should be Hitler-istic? Rolls off the tongue better.

Posted by: Thom "Tekcor" McGrath at January 31, 2008 11:00 AM

Calisthenics seems to play a role in becoming Fergalicious:

"My body stay vicious,
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness"

Posted by: Steve at January 31, 2008 11:04 AM

Nah. Should be "Hitler-iffic". :)

Posted by: ARandomPerson at January 31, 2008 11:05 AM

Considering that being Fergalicious involves pissing your pants and being totally fugtrocious, (hey, a lot like being Hitler-istic, right?) I'm okay with that being a really exclusive club.

Posted by: Lady at January 31, 2008 11:07 AM

I'm gonna go with Lady on this one...I seriously don't see what Josh Duhamel finds so attractive about her horse-face.

Posted by: Lefty Rodrigeuz at January 31, 2008 11:12 AM


Actually, it would be Hitler-tastic. See Fergalicious is a combination of Fergie and Delicious. Both of which, I guess, are supposed to be good things. Therefore Hitler and Fantastic would be a likewise saying, where as Hitler-istic means you're "like Hitler".

Of course, in my book, Fergie and Hitler rank pretty close on my "people who suck" list.

.......*sigh*....I'm such a doofus.

Steve's right, its all about the Calisteentics.

Posted by: Kane at January 31, 2008 11:14 AM

So I'm supposed to believe that Ferguson from Clarissa Explains It All, can not be Fergalicious?


He can and is.

Posted by: Steve at January 31, 2008 11:20 AM

Well my dog is kinda chubby and we started calling him Pork - then I started calling him Porkalicious and he seems to like it! :)

Posted by: Tricia at January 31, 2008 11:27 AM

She clearly states two different definitions in the song:

1. "Fergalicious, definition: make them boys go loco"
2. "Fergalicious, definition: make them boys go crazy"

So, it seems logical that you only need to fall under one of those definitions to become "fergalicious."

Also, I disagree that the spelling ability matters, since they repeatedly spell "tasty" incorrectly...

"T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y"

Posted by: Laura at January 31, 2008 11:38 AM

Am I to understand that not spelling well is part of it and given my earlier misspellings, I may be Fergalicious after all?

This is encouraging news.

Posted by: Steve at January 31, 2008 11:48 AM

Love Hitler-tastic, personally. No so sure about Fergie. She shares her name with our (English) Prince's booty-call and she ain't delicious at all. The only was she could make a boy go crazy (or loco for that matter) is to force them to drink sea-water.

So there you have it: Hitler was better than Fergie, at least as far as ajoining adjectives go.

Posted by: Delirium at January 31, 2008 12:00 PM

David Letterman once used "Hitler-iffic" in a top-ten list many years ago. Not that it matters.

Posted by: GDad at January 31, 2008 12:04 PM

So what you're saying is the "Fergalicious" class I've been taking are a ripoff?

This is bullshit...

Posted by: Andrew at January 31, 2008 12:16 PM

he's steve-alicious it's just like the -ness like kateness and thomness it aplies to everyone but it's ment just for you! like cabbage patch dolls!

Posted by: Kait at January 31, 2008 12:17 PM

Oh, when will it end???

(and by that, I mean the new earworm running through my head)

Posted by: Dana at January 31, 2008 12:20 PM

Dana - quick, sing Mary Had a Little Lamb, or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star..

Posted by: Jen at January 31, 2008 12:26 PM

super fergalicious hitlerastic alidocious (the last one is for muhamed ali) and it just had to be done

Posted by: Don at January 31, 2008 12:28 PM

What I want to know is: how does one (Fergalicious or not) put a boy on "rock rock"?

Posted by: Gypsy at January 31, 2008 12:30 PM

"So I'm supposed to believe that Ferguson from Clarissa Explains It All, can not be Fergalicious?"

No, that would be Fergulicious. There's a distinct difference

Posted by: Mancho at January 31, 2008 12:51 PM

fergalicious to me means that someone can't use a dictionary to save life so we make up own words.

Gypsy I want to know how to do that too or what exactly is meant by "put those boys on rock rock".

Posted by: lesley at January 31, 2008 12:52 PM

Her Fergingnessosityismology is beyond comprehension!

Who is she, anyway?

Posted by: Jolene at January 31, 2008 1:13 PM

Ah, in reference to being Fergalicious, I do believe a few other prerequisites are:

Being a big girl and not crying, cuz "big girls don't cry" and also missing someone/something like a "child misses a blanket." For instance, I believe that Fergie really was singing about missing her brain in this song. It is my firm belief that if you cannot come up with better lyrics than refering to a child missing their blanket, the only conclusion one could come to would be that they don't have a brain. I'm really just saying...

Posted by: tara at January 31, 2008 1:22 PM

I wish my name was Larry. Then I could be TesticuLarry.

Posted by: John at January 31, 2008 1:38 PM

I was wondering if there as a ratio of synthesized hand claps to time passed that would equal a sum of Fergalicious. The song comes in at around 3:40 and there is an average of 1.25 synthesized hand claps per second. At a song length of 220 seconds there would have to be 275 synthesized hand claps total to reach a point of being Fergalicious.

I am a little over 37 years old. On my birthday I would have to have had 1,460,138,400 Synthesized hand claps throughout my life in order to reach the sum of Fergalicious. I wonder if anyone could actually reach Fergaliciousness in their lifetime.

Posted by: Todd in SF at January 31, 2008 1:43 PM

Don't worry Steve, you can always be Stevalicious.

This site is sneezetastic!

Posted by: Little Dog at January 31, 2008 2:21 PM

It's Hitler-tastic because as someone above correctly pointed out, it is something that is good despite it's also being something related to Hitler. You could be described as Hitler-tastic if you:

Had a sweet mustache
Liked yelling in front of crowds
Were nice to dogs (hey he was)
Enjoyed it when people peed on you

And many others....

Posted by: will at January 31, 2008 2:41 PM

Maybe "rock rock" has something to do with getting one's rocks off.

Posted by: Poodle at January 31, 2008 2:43 PM

Okay, nobody will think this is funny but me because as usual, you had to be there.

But when I was a freshman in high school we started called each other by the first letter of our names followed by -ness (I dunno who started it and it only lasted about a week, but that besides the point). So, for example, my name is Darryl so I was D-ness (what's up D-ness). Anyhow, I also had a friend named Paul, who unfortunately became Penis and my buddy Alon was Anus.

So here's the funny part. Paul didn't know what the word anus meant. he had never heard it before. So the teacher calls on Alon to go to the front of the class to do something on the blackboard and Paul starts shouting repeatedly, "Go Anus, Go Anus, Go Anus" We could not stop laughing. the teacher did not even know what to say. I still laugh about that today when I think about it.

Posted by: Darryl at January 31, 2008 3:49 PM

You spelled it two different ways. One step forward and one step back? Good luck, though.

Posted by: Santa's Lil Bubble-Popper at January 31, 2008 5:10 PM

I have a cat named Fergie (she was named by her breeder after the Dutchess of York). She answered to it, so we kept the name. One of my nicknames for her for the past four years has been "Fergalicious". Imagine my horror when the song came out.

Posted by: Boska at January 31, 2008 5:14 PM

"Girl you taste to the T, to the A, to the S T I E" (tastie? as in tastie pasties? wtf)

if "fergalicious" means "32-year old wrinkly horse who can't spell and likes to accentuate her humps" then i guess yes, fergie IS fergalicious.

Posted by: Jane at January 31, 2008 5:15 PM

I had a mind blast when I clicked on this site's link from my site, 'cause I had just signed onto iChat [it's like AIM, but for Macs] and I thought someone had a complete conversation on my screen name all about Fergie...I almost had a seizure....


We shouldn't strive to be Fergalicious....we'd all just end up with limited spelling ability, a strange fetish with our own 'lumps' and a taste for terrible clothes....

^_6;; Jer

Posted by: Jer at January 31, 2008 5:45 PM

So... I guess it comes down to the REAL question:

Who REALLY wants to be Fergalicious? Really?It's just too much darn work.

Posted by: Lauren at January 31, 2008 5:53 PM

Is Anthony the same person as Tony, the author of Yes, Vagina? That story is perhaps the best thing I've seen on this here "web" site.


Posted by: Lenny at January 31, 2008 6:19 PM

I'm thinking the "put the boys on rock, rock" line is about making guys act like they are crack heads... rock being short for crackrock. At least that's how I took it which probably says a lot about me. BTW, absolutely love the site. :)

Posted by: JonJon at January 31, 2008 7:02 PM

This Anthony man has all the answers, does this mean he is Tony-riffic!

Posted by: Laura at January 31, 2008 7:54 PM

1) Santa's Lil Bubble Popper: We know I spelled it 2 ways. The first way in the IM had been misspelled -- hence "learning how to spell it may be the first step to becoming it."

2) Lenny: It's not the same Tony. But this Anthony has made other appearances on the site as well.

Posted by: Steve at January 31, 2008 8:02 PM

hmm - my friend and i think she is more tranny licous

because she looks more like a tranny

Posted by: michellenyc at January 31, 2008 10:45 PM

You know this will seem quite sad and show what a doddering old biddy I am (at the ripe old age of 32) but when the 'kids these days' started banging on about this 'Fergie' in the corridors of my workplace and I would hear this name on the news and in jokes and all... well I just thought the British royal Fergie had somehow managed to make a start as some tarty little pop idol of some sort. The thought of her singing about her tits in front of the Queen had me in hysterics.

Posted by: An Idiot at February 1, 2008 2:54 AM

While I'm here and before you get a chance to delete it - there appears to be spam here offering "free lesbian sex". That sounds great, actually, but I rather suspect that depends on the lesbians. I mean, if they looked like me for instance - no amount of discount on price is going to make anyone want any.

... except women seem to be horribly attracted to discount sales. Actually I should try sticking a poster on my chest that says "100% off One Day Only! Sex with ME!! FREE!"

* results not guaranteed.
** no refunds

Posted by: An Idiot at February 1, 2008 3:00 AM

1. "Fergalicious, definition: make them boys go loco"
2. "Fergalicious, definition: make them boys go crazy"

Well at least it seems the possibility of being Fergalicious doesn't stop at some sort of english barrier.

Now if only we could get some "3.Fergalicious, faites-les les garçons aller le fou" then maybe we could get some of the attractive Montreal females in on this.

Posted by: Rob at February 1, 2008 7:02 AM

I tried to be "Fergalicious" last year in an attempt to make my kids appreciate me more, but couldn't. It seems that my "lady lumps" (aka man boobs) are not actually "lovely" and nobody cares what I'm gonna do with all this junk inside my trunk. I tried to put my wife on "rock rock" and was told me to go "rock" myself. I'm not sure how to put oneself on rock rock so I'm giving that one up. At this point, I'm just not living a life that could be considered as "Fergalicious" as it is a "Ronstrosity".
Apparently I'm going to have to bow out of the "Club of all things icious". I didn't want to be a member anyway. I think I'll call Sy Sperling. I hear he has an opening in his hair club.

Posted by: Ronnie with an R at February 1, 2008 8:00 AM

Hey look! Porn!
"Porn-Bots"...The name would suggest something very cool. Porn compiled with robots!? C'mon! Add a beer-bot and a salamisandwich-bot and you've got a party!
However, porn-bots are very sad evil creations. They're deffinately not any kind of icious.

Posted by: Ronnie with an R at February 1, 2008 8:45 AM

Hey, don't be hatin' on Fergie's lumps. Y'all KNOW the girl can't help it!

Posted by: ChiaLynn at February 1, 2008 9:03 AM

Maybe Rock Rock is a location. Like. . . a mountain where people rock out. Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure the main singer from Creed was rather familiar with Rock Rock, as he often struck the Jesus pose on top of large CG mountains. Maybe this was inspired by Fergie, and that is how she "puts the boys on Rock Rock." Although, I suppose you'd have to assume that Creed actually rocks, and that's another debate entirely.

Posted by: Rachel at February 1, 2008 10:18 AM

Although not Fergilicious,
my middle name is Aloisius,
I don't like to do the dishes,
Please eat apples (they're nutritious),
Find a Genie -- get 3 wishes,
Mrs. Paul? She freezes fishes.

Um... I think I'm done now.

Posted by: Terry at February 1, 2008 11:55 AM

I may be horridly naive here (and a bad speller too, i apologize) but what is just one rock? I have never seen it on any of the other websites i frequent so im guessing its nothing to do with sex

Posted by: Wilfiminia at February 1, 2008 12:47 PM

I think any could be "Fergalicious", but who would want too. Fergie always seems like she's kinda sad and not happy with her life.

I think everyone should strive to be Danilicious; it's much more appealing, and less horse-faced!
OH! And I even know how to spell "tasty"

Posted by: Dani the Girl at February 1, 2008 12:59 PM

anyone can be fergalicious, i know i am.

Posted by: tim leary at February 1, 2008 3:16 PM

I hope somebody shoots her in the spine.
Then maybe we could be spared her singing about how good she thinks she is, because she probably won't be so sure minus the use of her legs. Whore.

Posted by: Rachel at February 1, 2008 8:39 PM

I can't believe nobody came up with Mussolinitastic.
-or Dahmeriffic.

Come on people, let's work on this.

Posted by: James Jones at February 1, 2008 9:22 PM

I know someone named Nick Fergison (or howsever you spell it) and he says he is Fergiliscious.

Posted by: Amy at February 1, 2008 10:08 PM

The only thing better than being Fergalicious? Being bacon-tastic. The fine folks at AOL have found a way to optimize the tastiness of our favorite pork product... Or, at the very least, someone has...


After eating a few handfuls of that stuff, you won't need to be up in the gym just workin' on your fitness... 'cause you'll be dead of a coronary before you've finished it.

Posted by: AJ at February 2, 2008 1:55 AM

surely you'd have to be kevin bacon?
as featured in yacht club episode 11:

(or you british radio DJ and ex blue peter presenter richard bacon)

Posted by: danthefloorman at February 2, 2008 8:19 AM

David Letterman's Top Ten Least Used Adjectives.

I remember "Hitleriffic" was one of them. "Owl-flavored" was another.

Posted by: John in Hawaii at February 2, 2008 12:51 PM

Top Ten Least-Used Hyphenated Words:
10. Lick-proof
9. Owl-flavored
8. Hat-resistant
7. Trunk-ripened
6. Gumbel-scented
5. Post-moistened
4. Hitler-riffic
3. Casket-tested
2. Pants-happy
1. Mookie-proofed

Posted by: Phill at February 2, 2008 4:09 PM


Oh.....well maybe not.

Posted by: planko at February 2, 2008 6:11 PM

What about Hitlarious?

Posted by: w at February 2, 2008 7:09 PM

i think fergalicious=butterface.

Posted by: joanna banana at February 2, 2008 8:49 PM

I really like Hitlarious. That's good.

Posted by: Paige at February 3, 2008 12:50 AM

Osama-riffic? Like 'horrific'.

Posted by: Ellana at February 3, 2008 3:04 AM

I don't think I would like to be Fergalicious, it sounds dangerous, plus I don't want to be up in the Gym just "workin' on my fitness" And I sure as hell don't him, who ever the hell she is referring to in the song to be my witness

Posted by: Sherman Lamport at February 3, 2008 8:49 AM

Sadly, I do believe only Fergie can be Fergalicious, but like others have said, that's like being jealous of garbage for being putrilicious. So don't worry too much about it. Focus more on not being Pickled.

Personally, I'm Danomatic, I welcome others to be such themselves, and I play the ukulele for The Tree Brains.

Posted by: LiteralDan at February 3, 2008 2:17 PM

As far as I've read, apparently it's better to NOT be Fergalicious.... but what about bootylicious?

Posted by: Nicole at February 3, 2008 7:52 PM