May 19, 2007
Haiku-tastropheAs if AIDS and tsunamis weren't enough, along comes this bottle of iced tea. From the Ito En company, the label features one of their Haiku award winners: Where's the good ol' haiku 5-7-5 syllable structure? This one is 4-5-5. According to their website, this is the "New-Style Haiku" where you don't have to bother with the whole 5-7-5 thing or even try to make it 17 syllables. They say this is to encourage as much participation as possible. It encouraged Charles Rodning to save 3 whole syllables, apparently securing his title as the bad-boy of iced tea poetry. Chuck, I'm sure you're a nice guy, but I reject your new-style haiku. (And since I'm a nice guy too, I still give you the award for Best Brief Sentence About a Teapot.) My buddy, Steve, wrote an old-style haiku to express his feelings about the new-style haiku: New Haiku is bad That's some good haikuing. Since anyone can now change the rules of anything, I've made a few official changes of my own: The New-Style Working Out is scratching myself. The New-Style Jessica Alba has a crush on me. The New-Style Paying Taxes is having a little pudding. The New New-Style Haiku is the old haiku. And the New-Style Really Big Penis is 4 inches. (That's so when Alba makes her move, she won't be disappointed. But it doesn't really matter, because the New-Style Disappointed is horny, naked and psyched.) Click here for The Sneeze Home Page! |
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