September 5, 2006

A Wink of an Eye

Five of us were in a room the other day. At one point it came out that 2 of the 5 were physically unable to wink. I never knew winking was such a potentially exclusive club. As one of the winkers, this gives me pleasure.

I have to believe 2 out of 5 is higher than the norm. Below is a highly scientific poll to help us all found out.


Can you wink?
Yes
No
  
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Is there any other seemingly simple action you're physically unable to do? The comment board is open NOW CLOSED.



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Posted by Steven | Archive
Comments

Hey Steve,

I have four kids, two of which can wink correctly. I can only surmise that my gene pool contains 50% winkability.

Posted by: John at September 5, 2006 9:10 AM

I can't and never could roll my R's. All I can do is make a stupid sound with my tongue that does nothing but make the roof of my mouth itchy.

Posted by: Steve at September 5, 2006 9:10 AM

Finger snapping is, I think, a common diability in some. Like me.

Posted by: davechuck at September 5, 2006 9:13 AM

Stuff that many people know: the ability to roll your tongue up like a tube (looks a bit rude) is genetically determined - you can or you cain't no matter how hard you try (I can so hahaha all you loser flat tongues)

Posted by: fattmatt at September 5, 2006 9:16 AM

I can twist my arm 360 degrees. It's not a magic trick either, all of my siblings can do it, but I've never met anyone else who can.

Posted by: Knives at September 5, 2006 9:16 AM

Another is curling your tongue...some people can do three (I can do one), but a lot of people can't do any. What I've found is normally the people that can't do any CAN touch their tongue to their nose.

Posted by: Eli at September 5, 2006 9:16 AM

I did not answer your poll because . . . I can only wink with ONE eye (and not all that well). Does that make me an automatic yes - or - am I a member of some mutant group of half winkers?

Posted by: Charlotte at September 5, 2006 9:18 AM

My wife is unable to whistle. She can actually whistle, but only in a flat monotone fashion.

I am a skilled winker from way back.

Posted by: Elmo's Ghost at September 5, 2006 9:19 AM

I try to wink...it just looks like I'm squinting or wincing at you.

Posted by: Kyla at September 5, 2006 9:22 AM

50% of my kids (my 11 yr old son) can't whistle or snap his fingers. The other 50% (my 6 yr old daughter) can do both. He can do the Vulcan greeting, though, and his sister can't. Neither can I.

Posted by: Trillian at September 5, 2006 9:23 AM

Agree with Charlotte - there should be a "Not Very Well" option. That's me. There's a difference between scrunching up your face to wink and doing a rapid-fire blink with one eye - the latter is what I can't do for the life of me.

Two more simple actions: raising one eyebrow, Spock-style (can't do it); and wiggling your ears (can do).

And I can't roll my Rs either.

Posted by: Kevin at September 5, 2006 9:25 AM

I cannot whistle anything other than a short tuneless squeak. I Can, however, roll up my tongue, wink, touch my nose with my tongue and make rude noises by placing the palms of my hands together (my brother and I can both do this, but have not yet met anyone else that can). I cannot raise one eyebrow, though.... I am upset at not being blessed with that talent.

Posted by: tiramisu at September 5, 2006 9:27 AM

i can wink with my right eye. but my other eye closes about 1/4 when i try to.

also, i can only raise my left eye brow when i try to raise one at a time....

and i have a slightly crooked smiletoo. seriously...

Posted by: Angela M at September 5, 2006 9:28 AM

I CANNOT whistle. Just air comes out with no sounds. People have been trying to teach me for 26 years to no avail.

I CAN roll my toungue, snap, wink, and do the Vulcan greeting.

Posted by: AMG at September 5, 2006 9:38 AM

I also cannot snap my fingers. I know a bunch of people that cant whistle.

Posted by: shannon at September 5, 2006 9:41 AM

Second to Angela M, I have full independent control of both eyebrows whereas my wife can only raise/lower them in unison. Weird.

Posted by: Glen at September 5, 2006 9:41 AM

i can wink, but only with one eye. i can't whistle at all. my husband can wink with either eye and does so frequently to prove his superior winking skills, and only gets really annoyed when i raise one eyebrow a la the rock in response.

Posted by: colleen at September 5, 2006 9:43 AM

The Vulcan Greeting... absolutely cannot do it. Forcing my fingers into position with my other hand actually hurts.
Whistling, winking, eyebrows give me no trouble. Rolling my tongue is no trouble.
Can't wiggle my ears, though, need to work on that.

Posted by: Damon at September 5, 2006 9:44 AM

When I'm drunk, I'm physically unable to say 'no'. Doest that count?

Posted by: Thomas, the retarded monkey at September 5, 2006 9:44 AM

My wife can not snort like a pig.

Posted by: DJ Walker at September 5, 2006 9:45 AM

My younger son (6) can whistle, snap, and wink. It infuriates his older brother (14) who can only whistle and wink. Not only can his younger brother snap, he can do it with both hands simultaneously. I myself could not snap until I was trying to get my boyfriend to look at our cat at age....19! I was shaking my hand and suddenly a snap came out... JOY

Our whole family can wink by the way. Including the two year old.

Posted by: Heather P at September 5, 2006 9:46 AM

I can't eat if there's a midget in the room.

Posted by: will at September 5, 2006 9:47 AM

I'm so happy that I've found other people who can't whistle - I truly thought I was the only one

Posted by: artygal at September 5, 2006 9:47 AM

I can make a clover shape with my tongue, but I cannot turn it upside-down. My ex can do the latter but not the former. My daughter can do the clover and my son can turn it upside-down. They are both quite infuriated that neither of them can do both.

Damn you, fickle genetics!

Posted by: Mir at September 5, 2006 9:47 AM

Not only can I wink, but I can wink with both eyes at the same time!

Posted by: gnomeking at September 5, 2006 9:54 AM

Nobody here has mentioned the nose wiggle a la Bewitched. My grandfather can do it, nobody else in my family has shown the ability yet.

I can wink, snap, and whistle in 3 languages but can't roll my tounge or wiggle my ears.

Posted by: Paul at September 5, 2006 10:02 AM

I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only dork who can't snap her fingers. I've been feeling deficient in this area for years. I can whistle pretty well. My husband is the opposite -- he can snap but not whistle...

Posted by: Tracie at September 5, 2006 10:02 AM

I can't whistle. Never have been able to.

Posted by: Amity at September 5, 2006 10:03 AM

I can't smile on command. Apparently, (according to friends who I assume aren't lying) say I have a nice smile but it only comes out when I'm laughing or not thinking about it.

Posted by: christian at September 5, 2006 10:05 AM

I can raise my right eyebrow by itself, but not my left. My wife is exactly the opposite.

Posted by: Bryan at September 5, 2006 10:10 AM

I can do the winking and the Bewitched thing and the snapping and even the star trek finger greeting thing... but can't roll my tongue at all, not even a little bit. Both my parents can.

Posted by: Deity at September 5, 2006 10:11 AM

I can wink, whistle, roll my tongue, snap with both hands, Vulcan salute, but no eyebrow control and no ear wiggling. My son can flip his tongue right over sidewize but can not roll it. he can snap and wink and Vulcan salute.

Posted by: Diane at September 5, 2006 10:12 AM

I can't whistle, but I can wink - either eye.

I used to be able to snap my fingers on either hand, but then I busted my right hand so now it's a left-hand-only sort of thing.

I can't understand macro economics. Totally unable. I think there's a part of my brain missing.

Posted by: JulieT at September 5, 2006 10:12 AM

I can flare my nostrils repeatedly at will. My wife cannot.

Posted by: Zclone at September 5, 2006 10:14 AM

I have to move my whole cheek to create what could be called a wink. But even that I can only do on the right side of my face.

However, I can fold my tongue in half (but not roll it) or flip it upside down, and I can flip my bottom lip upside down.

I can't really whistle though.

Posted by: Stacia at September 5, 2006 10:20 AM

I can wink, both eyes or either eye individually.
I can roll my rrrr's, and i can cross my eyes.
I can make owl and pidgeon noises with my hands.

uhm...

I can roll my tongue, and make my face go several shades of purple.

Posted by: Will at September 5, 2006 10:23 AM

I cannot whistle, roll my tounge or snap my fingers. Call me recessive.

Posted by: brad at September 5, 2006 10:24 AM

Vulcan greeting (with tongue sticking out from the effort), check. Whistling, check. Winking, check. Tongue rolling, check.

But I can't do the finger whistle thing. You know, where you look cool while hailing a cab or calling a dog? The classic, short, powerful whistle achieved by placing thumb and middle finger tips together in a circle somewhere on your lower lip or something? Can't do it. My mom's a pro, though. She's been trying to teach me for 30 years, still can't do it. Sigh. I ain't giving up.

Posted by: MademoiselleCaroline at September 5, 2006 10:27 AM

I can wink, roll my tongue, wiggle my nose, raise my eye brows, flare my nostrils, and snap my fingers.

But none of that helped me in college since I can't burp on command.

I felt so left out.......

Posted by: MikeK at September 5, 2006 10:27 AM

I can wink--my chick cannot, but her daughter can. Everyone in my family can wink as far as I know. One thing I cannot do is hold my index, middle, & ring finger up (signalling "3") without my pinky finger trying to rise up. I have to use my thumb to hold it back. On second thought, I have to use my thumb to hold back the other two when I do 'Peace' sign too.

Posted by: big 70 at September 5, 2006 10:29 AM

I also can't roll my R's ... as a young kid in French class, it was quite distressing.

What I find interesting is that some of this is trainable. I'm genetically (or so they tell me) able to roll my tongue but over the last year or two I taught myself to also make a W.

It's easy ... just roll and concentrate on pulling the tip of your tongue back. :)

Posted by: Gbert at September 5, 2006 10:31 AM

I cannot do the farting noise with my armpit.

Posted by: Ms. Manners at September 5, 2006 10:33 AM

I am right-handed. With my left hand I can make a fist and open it one finger at a time (starting with my thumb), extending each finger indepenently of the others. I can't do that with my right hand unless I use my thumb to hold the fingers down. I'd like to ask a left-handed person if the opposite is true for them.

Posted by: Inkwell at September 5, 2006 10:34 AM

I can roll my tongue over and wink with my left eye. I can also raise my left eyebrow. I can't really wink with my right eye (I can get a good squint by moving my entire right cheek).

My mom can wiggle her ears and roll her tongue into a tube and a clover, but can't roll it over.

I can burp really, really loudly, but not on command.

Posted by: Margie at September 5, 2006 10:39 AM

I thought I could wink, but my fiance corrected me. I wonder how many of your voters have been auditied. Seems the results are skewed.

Posted by: Katie at September 5, 2006 10:39 AM

I can't burp. Sometimes tiny little burps sneak out, but I've never in my life had one of those deep satisfying-sounding burps.

Posted by: P at September 5, 2006 10:39 AM

My wife can't flair her nostrals, wiggle her ears or roll her tounge.

If I had only known that before we got married.....

Posted by: kevin at September 5, 2006 10:40 AM

I can't raise one eyebrow by itself.
I can't whistle unless I suck the air in, which makes it hard to breath.

Posted by: Deb at September 5, 2006 10:40 AM

All the women on my mothers side can wink like a doll, without moving the rest of their face including the lower eyelid. so when they do it , it looks like a dolls eye rolling down. I can not do this. I am also adopted. But I am ambidexterousand i have only met one other truly ambidexterous person in my life. I can write and do most things equally well with both hands. which means less carpal tunnel for me. and a happy fella at home.

Posted by: TINK at September 5, 2006 10:42 AM

I can wink and whistle and fold my tongue and snap and all that, but I can't spit. I mean, when you're sick and you've got all that phlegm sitting in your throat and you have to hack it up and spit it out. I can't do that. I just choke and swallow it again.

Posted by: Dianne at September 5, 2006 10:43 AM

I can't think of a normal thing I can't do, but my husband is unable to make the number 3 with his fingers...he can't hold up those 3 fingers all at once, so he has to come up with other creative ways of indicating 3 with his hands.

Posted by: Mae at September 5, 2006 10:46 AM

I cannot raise one eyebrow and it drives me crazy. No matter how hard I try its just not happening.

Posted by: Rorie at September 5, 2006 10:47 AM

I cannot swallow a pill. Just can't. Even with a glass of water or anything. I need to chew it, and most of the time, they taste real bad.

Posted by: Stan at September 5, 2006 10:53 AM

I can wink without any issues, my ex-wife couldn't do it and it really bothered her.

Posted by: T.C. at September 5, 2006 10:53 AM

I can wink, whistle and snap my fingers, but I can't roll my tongue or touch my tongue to my nose (my aunt can).

Posted by: Victoria at September 5, 2006 10:55 AM

I can raise one eyebrow with both my eyebrows. I can wink too.
I can't roll my tongue or twist it sideways (my sister can do it very well). I can't whistle either.

Posted by: Rachel at September 5, 2006 11:00 AM

I recently discovered, while my friends and I were having a discussion about wingspan, that I cannot fully straighten my elbows. I get to about 176 degrees, not a full 180. After further investigation, I found my brother shares the trait.

Posted by: jeadly at September 5, 2006 11:02 AM

I can cross my eyes. A lot of people say they can, and their eyes barely move, but mine go straight to the middle. I cannot do a quick wink; my wink uses my entire face and looks ridiculous. I cannot whistle either. However, I make up for it by being able to raise my left eyebrow and lower my right (however, i cannot raise the right and lower the left).

Posted by: Megan at September 5, 2006 11:11 AM

I can burp on demand and my sister can fold her little fingers to her palm indendently of her other fingers.

Posted by: Steve at September 5, 2006 11:13 AM

I must be genetically blessed...I thought everyone could do almost all of these with little or no effort.

I can wink- with either eye. I can move my eyebrows independently or in unison, or do the wave with them. I can move my scalp back and forth. I can wiggle both of my ears. I can flare my nostrils repeatedly and wiggle my nose up and down. I can roll my tongue, flip it over, make the clover and even do the wave with it. I can whistle by sucking air in or blowing out. I can even whistle without moving my lips into the kissing shape. I can whistle the loud sharp whistle with or without my fingers. I can snap my fingers on both hands using my thumb and any of the others. I can one handed clap with either hand. I can do the vulvan greeting and then move the two inner fingers together to make a w and go back and forth repeatedly.

Posted by: bigwood303 at September 5, 2006 11:20 AM

I can't fully unbend my knees when lying on my back! D:
They'll remain bent at about 120 degrees. Never a straight angle.

Can't touch my toes either and I've never been able to.

At least I can wink both eyes!

Posted by: avelacuna at September 5, 2006 11:27 AM

I can wink, roll my tongue, pat my head with my right hand, rub my tummy with my left hand, and when I switch, I pat my tummy with my right hand and rub my head with my left hand.

and i am left handed...does that have anything to do with it??

Posted by: Susan at September 5, 2006 11:31 AM

Hmm. Like a lot of people, I'm going to mention the whole tongue-rolling thing.... which I'm unable to do. It's weird, though, because both my parents can do it, and my brother can do it. Looks like I'm a genetic retard, or something... although I CAN touch my chin with my tongue, and I can ALMOST touch my nose.

Also-- I'm not sure if people have mentioned this already because I've only read a few of the posts, but there are a select number of people that I've met that can raise only one of their eyebrows at a time. Of those people, only a few have enough skill to do it with both eyebrows (well, raise one while keeping the other down, then switch which eyebrow is up). I'm one of those special people who can do it with both eyebrows. It's weird, though-- most of my family can do it, especially on my mom's side, but my brother can't do this one.

Posted by: mariposa at September 5, 2006 11:41 AM

I can't say the word "vagina". Not so much I can't...physically. I can say viginia. I won't say vagina. Can't roll my r's, can roll my tounge. can even lick my own tounge (bend the tip of the tounge back to lick the rear of the tounge). I can bend all my fingers backwards and touch my arm. My daughter can't whistle, snap, or wink. She looks like she's going into some sort of fit when she tries to wink, it's actually pretty entertaining.

Posted by: yomama at September 5, 2006 11:41 AM

When I was younger I could only wink one eye. Sometime in my late teens-early 20s I was suddenly able to wink both eyes. I don't know what changed, but I think that's freaking weird.

Posted by: Courtney at September 5, 2006 11:49 AM

I can wiggle my nose a la Sam on Bewitched and my three year old can too. Other than us notbody else in my family can do this.

Posted by: SAMO at September 5, 2006 11:51 AM

I can wink, belch, do the Vulcan sign and raise my right eyebrow (not my left).

I have a hard time starting my pee in a public restroom if other men are present and my pee will make a noticable splashing sound. I hear it's called being pee-shy. Whatever. Just get out so I can go, man.

Posted by: Koolray at September 5, 2006 11:51 AM

Wink, check. Tongue roll, check. Eyebrow raise, ear wiggle, whistle, snap fingers, check, check, check and check. Ditto for vucan salute, cross eyes, either eyebrow raise, moving one eye independantly, and flipping the end of my tongue upsidedown.

Touching the tip of my tongue to my nose or chin though would require a severe amount of not so pleasant stretching which I think I'll pass on.

Nostril flaring I'm working on :)

Posted by: Steve at September 5, 2006 11:55 AM

my mom cant roll her tounge. she just cant do it. everyone else i know can.

Posted by: kirk at September 5, 2006 11:55 AM

I can wink, roll my r's, roll my tongue, snap my fingers, burp, whistle in countless ways, raise my right eybrow (not my left), make farting noises with my armpit and say the word "vagina", however, I have not had the hiccups since I was 17...that's 20 years. I am claiming myself completely cured of hiccups and genetically inferior in every other way.

Posted by: jeleyman at September 5, 2006 11:56 AM

I'm with Mike and P -- while I can wink like a pro, I am physically incapable of purposefully burping. Every now and then (but rarely) one will slip out. But to just decide that I would like to burp and be able to produce said gas from my mouth....not happening. It looks so relaxing! (I admit to having a little bit of burp envy.)

Posted by: Tim at September 5, 2006 12:03 PM

I can wink, but only with my right eye.

Posted by: DaveyK at September 5, 2006 12:03 PM

Hold your palms face up and align your pinkies so that the edges of your hands are touching. Genetics determines whether the tips of your pinkies touch or bow apart at the last knuckle towards your ring fingers. Mine touch.

Posted by: Gabs at September 5, 2006 12:04 PM

I can't wiggle my toes independently of each other, though I can *sorta* wiggle my big toe *somewhat* independently. I stare at them and try to consciously move just one, but I think all four are mapped on my motor cortex as a single flipper.

I'm very handy in the winking, eyebrow-wiggling and nostril-flaring departments, having done all three since birth. This made for quite a few amusing "Seriously? Mashed peas?" *eyebrow raised* baby photos.

I can also wiggle my ears and roll my tongue. I can't roll my tongue back on itself or touch my nose with my tongue and I don't know what the heck the "clover" tongue thing is.

I can't really wiggle my nose. It takes awkward concentration. It looks less like I'm doing magic and more like I'm bothered by a booger and unable to pick it.

Posted by: maija at September 5, 2006 12:25 PM

I am able to wink, wiggle my ears, roll my tongue, whistle, do the vulcan thingy, cross my eyes, and my tongue can touch my nose.

I am just not able to raise a single eyebrow, and this makes me pretty sad.

Posted by: Kara at September 5, 2006 12:29 PM

i can snap, wink (with both eyes, not at the same time), roll my tongue and flip it upside down.

and about the tongue flipping/rolling. no one else in my family can do either, i learned how to at a summer camp when i was little.

craziness.

Posted by: janice at September 5, 2006 12:30 PM

I still can't lick my elbow.

Posted by: Zombie at September 5, 2006 12:30 PM

For those wishing to burp: chug a can of rootbeer. Then relax.

(I was a good burper as a baby too. Many a Church Women's Group meeting was disrupted as I rattled the teacups.)

But don't feel bad if you lack talent at deliberate burping. My brother could belch the alphabet, rude poems, and "swallow" and "exhale" air out of his stomach so that it sounded like someone plunging a toilet. Now he has gastroesophogeal reflux disease!

Posted by: maija at September 5, 2006 12:31 PM

I can roll my tongue and touch my nose with it but have sworn to use these powers only for good. I cannot snap my fingers.

Posted by: Dominique at September 5, 2006 12:32 PM

hmm, weird... i did the pinky thing that Gabs posted about, and mine bow apart slightly. Odd.

Posted by: mariposa at September 5, 2006 12:34 PM

I can't flare my nostrils, though the rest of my family can.
I cannot whistle a tune - only monotone.

I can't fold my tongue, but I can make it into a "taco" and turn it. I can only turn it one way, though.

And I missed the double-jointed gene - the entire rest of my family can do it, and I can't. It totally grosses me out, anyway, so big deal. =]

Posted by: Andi at September 5, 2006 12:37 PM

I can wink with either eye but can only snap my fingers on my right hand, my left hand just doesn't cooperate. I can make the vulcan sign with either hand.

I can't whistle, never could. I've always wanted to do that loud between your fingers whistle though.

I can roll my tongue, make the w, touch my chin and the tip of my nose. I can also tie a cherry stem into a know with my teeth and tongue.

Can't wiggle my ears or nose either.

Posted by: Melissa at September 5, 2006 12:37 PM

I can wiggle my right ear, but not my left. I cant burp on command - about once a year I accidently burp, and it is completely involuntary. Weird. I also can't really whistle. I have sort of figured out a way to ghetto-whistle, but its mostly just blowing air through my teeth.

Posted by: Shawn at September 5, 2006 12:37 PM

I can do stereograms using the cross-eyed method but not the parallel method.

I couldn't wiggle my ears until I got glasses in my late teens or early twenties. So it was a learned talent for me.

When I'm eating, I can't control when juices squirt out from under my tongue. Even after swallowing my food, I have to cover my mouth before I can safely talk to someone.

Posted by: Derek at September 5, 2006 12:38 PM

Yes I can wink! Well, its harder for my right eye

I don't know if you know Steve, but to put on makeup, to must close one eye, (and leave the other open, to see what you're doing) but keep it smooth.. Like when you're sleeping. But I just CANT keep my right eye "smooth" with the other eye open. I have to hold it down with one finger

I also can't whistle

Posted by: Laura at September 5, 2006 12:40 PM

I cannot whistle.

Posted by: Skate at September 5, 2006 12:41 PM

I can only wink with one eye.

Posted by: Alex at September 5, 2006 12:49 PM

I cant whistle, or snap my fingers, which means that my hopes of becoming an internationally known doo-wap phenomenon are null.

Posted by: JDWEX1117 at September 5, 2006 12:54 PM

I've heard that it is physically impossible to lick your own elbow. But as a matter of fact, I have a close friend who can do so... actual tongue-to-elbow. I was wondering if it was just a double jointed thing, or if she just has an abnormally long tongue? Photographic evidence can be provided if necessary.

Posted by: Jenna Bob at September 5, 2006 12:58 PM

I am unable to whistle. :(

Posted by: Laura at September 5, 2006 1:07 PM

I can't roll my R's. I end up squirting spit on people. It kind of rocks though, cuz then they have spit on them.

Posted by: Harry Hormone at September 5, 2006 1:09 PM

I voted yes, but I actually can only wink with my left eye.

Posted by: nilole at September 5, 2006 1:18 PM

I can arch my left eyebrow separately from my right, but not the other way around.

Posted by: Katie at September 5, 2006 1:20 PM

I can only wink my right eye. I can snap my fingers. I can't whistle.

Posted by: Jillian at September 5, 2006 1:20 PM

I can whistle. wink with either eye, snap with both hands and roll my tongue. I can also do the vulcan thing. I can not however wiggle my nose or ears or do the one eyebrow thing. I can cick my tongue to call the dog but none of my children or husband can and they think I have some great talent because I can do this.

Posted by: tara at September 5, 2006 1:22 PM

The checklist for me - wink (left eye only), snap fingers (left hand only), roll Rs (yes), roll tongue (yes), whistle (yes). I'm right-handed, and it never occurred to me that I can only wink/snap on the left side before typing this....

I also cannot do the fart-armpit noise. My armpit/chest region has gone from skinny (as a kid) to somewhat muscular (as a teen/young adult) to somewhat flabby (as a beer-drinking computer jockey) but I've never been able to pull this off.

Posted by: Jamie at September 5, 2006 1:26 PM

I can only kinda wink, my whole face contorts when I do it. My dad never lets that go!

Posted by: JC at September 5, 2006 1:31 PM

I am an ambidextrous winker, I guess you can call it that. for some weird reason my wife can only wink with one eye, not sure what the stats are on that. anywho. another think that you might want numbers on is people that can raise only one eyebrow, I hate it because everyone in my family can do it, and I cant.

Posted by: Gama at September 5, 2006 1:39 PM

Like some here, I can wink, (one eye, the other, or both), snap my fingers, (left or right), curl, wave, and make a tube and click with my tongue, roll my 'r's, put on makeup, and beat the cat... all while saying 'vagina'.

Oh, and by the way... to 'will' who can make owl and pidgeon noises with his hands... brother, I gotta see that!! I usually have to utilize my mouth in some fashion to make those kind of noises.

Posted by: Big Will at September 5, 2006 1:40 PM

I can wink. My friend's wife cannot. She thinks my winking at her is very charming so I wink at her a lot. She is really cute so winking at her is lots of fun. She also has very kissable lips and beautiful long hair...uh oh, gotta go 'wink one out.'

Posted by: Stan at September 5, 2006 1:48 PM

Ive heard that some people can touch their elbows behind their back. But the only people Ive ever asked have been extremely well endowed women.

Posted by: Doug at September 5, 2006 1:49 PM

Hmm, reading these new posts and actually winking at my computer screen, I remembered that I can't wink without that same side of my mouth curving upwards slightly... so if i close my left eye in a wink my left mouth corner curls. It's more pronounced on the right side.... Does anyone else have this problem???

Posted by: mariposa at September 5, 2006 1:49 PM

I can't roll my R's or whistle very loudly.

Posted by: Merry at September 5, 2006 1:52 PM

I was sitting here happily winking away when a coworker happened by and gave me a strange look. Is that sexual harrassment?

;-P

Posted by: Stinkyboy at September 5, 2006 1:53 PM

I wish I could roll my R's. In high school I had to take German because of my R rolling deficiency. I can make the loogie hocking noise really well though, so jetzt spreche ich deutsch.

I can wink, raise my right eyebrow, snap like a mo-flicka, cross my eyes, roll and clover my tongue, and make amusing farting noise with my always clammy hands.

Oh yeah, and until a few years ago, I too could not whistle. It took a weekend of hard work and spitting on my then boyfriend, but it paid off. I can whistle now. YESSSSS!

Posted by: Lizzy at September 5, 2006 1:57 PM

Hi,

I have the wonderful blessing of being able to flair my nostrils - one or both. My tung is also not much tied down so it looks real huge - I can stick it in my nose. Kids, particularly, like it when I do that. They get all grossed out and fall to the floor laughing. I can also command each tuchus to flex but I think this is common among the higher primates. I am the only one in my family that can do these marvelous things. I can not however, individually twitch my ears or move my scalp on command, like my oldest brother. And let me tell you, he always pulls out the ear trick AFTER I do the nose thing and shows me up every time.

Posted by: johnny at September 5, 2006 1:58 PM

I can wiggle my ears- both or just one at a time, wink, whistle, raise one brow at a time. I can roll my tongue AND do t his weird thing where it looks like I fold it in half, and it stays.
My brother could flip his eyelids wrong side out.

Posted by: Annie at September 5, 2006 2:01 PM

I can't snap, or whistle.

Posted by: Bryan Hale at September 5, 2006 2:01 PM

Heya, Steve.

I can wink, but have the inability to whistle or snap my fingers for some reason. Checks and balances, I guess.

Posted by: Alek at September 5, 2006 2:02 PM

only with one eye. i'm also left handed

Posted by: mary at September 5, 2006 2:22 PM

mm I can wink (both eyes), snap, contort my tongue, vulcan, do the owl noise with my hands.

I can't raise or lower independent eyebrows though.

Posted by: reik at September 5, 2006 2:23 PM

I can only wink with one eye, unless I really concentrate, and then I can wink with the other. But then how lame is that, a wink should look natural, not like your putting a ton of effort into it. All 4 of my kids can wink with both eyes. My middle daughter started winking when she was 10 months old.

Posted by: Mikalan at September 5, 2006 2:24 PM

can't snap my fingers to save my life, or use chopsticks. i wink like a winking fiend, frequently roll my tounge (1, 2, and occasionally 3), and can do the Vulcan hand thing. oh, and i can wiggle my ears like nobodies business

Posted by: karen at September 5, 2006 2:28 PM

I just have to say I was unable to vote as I am able to wink... but only with my right eye.

What does that say about me?

Posted by: Emily at September 5, 2006 2:32 PM

I can wink, I can't whistle, I only just recently learned how to snap my fingers, I can't roll my tounge and I can't roll my Rs, I'm male and I can put my legs behind my head, I can do funny voices, and one interesting thing I can do is I can snarl, very loudly and very convincingly. I have yet to meet anyone else who can do this.

Posted by: Sofar at September 5, 2006 2:33 PM

To roll your tongue into a "U" shape I was told one must literally possess a gene for it. I'm a carrier. Sad tho, it's not contagious thu saliva.

Posted by: Luddy at September 5, 2006 2:38 PM

I feel strangely reassured to know that there are so many others out there who cannot snap. To think I have eschewed beat poetry gatherings so long for nothing!

Posted by: Gillian at September 5, 2006 2:40 PM

I would like Steve to update his post with more information of what constitutes a wink. I can close one eye quickly, but not nearly as quickly as some I've seen. Is it really something that some people can't do(close one eye and not the other?) or is winking more related to how convincingly you can close only one eye and also how quickly.

The best example of a wink I can recall off hand was in the Two Towers when Gandalf winks to um... maybe aragorn? I forget. But it takes place when they are entering the horse guy's castle and they are told to remove their weapons. Gandolf lets off the slightest most innocently "old gay guy" wink, that goes by so quickly and discretely many people I've watched the movie with haven't noticed.

If that is the level of winkery we are dissecting I would imagine far fewer than the 1,836(at the time of this comment) so called winkers can actually keep up.

Posted by: Wrao at September 5, 2006 2:42 PM

I CAN SNAP MY TOES!

Posted by: MATT at September 5, 2006 2:48 PM

i can't wink and i can't whistle

Posted by: Mandy at September 5, 2006 2:50 PM

As far as moving the toes independently, it should be impossible for almost every one of the readers who are human. The middle 3 toes all connect to the same area, preventing them from having independent movement. The little toe connects up slightly higher and should be able to move a bit without messing with the other. The big toe should be th only one that can move completely on its own.

Also, I can make the owl noise with hands, farting noise with hands/arms- and oddly enough, with my shirt off I can make that same farting noise between my neck and shoulder- kinda weird. I can also make the farting noise between my two butt cheeks.

Posted by: bigwood303 at September 5, 2006 3:09 PM

I can't wiggle my ears.

My girlfriend cannot raspberry... It's the funniest thing. So when I am losing an argument, I can always raspberry at her and she can't do anything back. It's a useful weapon.

Posted by: Seymourbibbons at September 5, 2006 3:11 PM

I can wink but my wife can't. She also can't roll her tongue or whistle which I can do. Neither of us can wiggle our ears.

Posted by: Frank at September 5, 2006 3:20 PM

I was always the outcast when my friends would do cool little things like that.

I cannot wink.
I cannot whistle.
I cannot wiggle my ears or nose.
I cannot do any of those shapes with my tongue.
Hell, I can't even straighten my right pinky finger.

Posted by: Kate at September 5, 2006 3:40 PM

I can't dance...I can't talk. The only thing about me is the way that I walk.

Posted by: Nursie at September 5, 2006 3:47 PM

well i dont know about winking but in my circle of close friends (my bf included), there are some that can't rise only one eyebrow, either they can only rise both or frown, but not the two things simultaneously with each eyebrow. nonetheless, it's amusing to see them try.

Posted by: Ana at September 5, 2006 3:48 PM

What about what I call "fish lips"? Sucking in your cheeks and opening and closing your lips like a fish. I can 't do it but my daughter and grandson both can.

Posted by: SG at September 5, 2006 3:55 PM

My brother cannot skip, I tried to teach him many times growing up, but he physically can't do it, just hops from one foot to the other, very odd.

Posted by: Laurie at September 5, 2006 4:02 PM

I have tested my entire family for the Wink Factor. There are four of us, and we have 100% Winkability. However, only 50% of us are able to raise each eyebrow independently, and Taco Tongue is a gift which has eluded us all.

I am unable to snap with any flare whatsoever. It's pretty pathetic. Just sort of a sad, Fwumping sound.

Posted by: hulagirl at September 5, 2006 4:04 PM

Another fascinating discovery!
My husband and my oldest son can spread their toes really wide apart. I fear they may be less evolved (or at least more closely related to apes) than most.

Posted by: hulagirl at September 5, 2006 4:07 PM

For years, I could either orally or manually stimulate my partner, but not both at once. Having to stop one to do the other was the source of much frustration on her part, and shortly thereafter, on my part. Practice, practice. practice. I can also touch her nose with my tongue!

Posted by: Neighborcat at September 5, 2006 4:09 PM

i can't snap my fingers. however i can wink either of my eyes which is not common that i've seen.

Posted by: lolls at September 5, 2006 4:13 PM

I can subconciously raise a single eyebrow, and sometimes raise one on purpose. It got me in a lot of trouble once, since I was stuck listening to my dad rant at me, and the eyebrow went up. His dad does that too, but he can't, and it just made his rant worse. And I can snap, Vulcan Salute, roll my tongue, and wink, although if I think about it too much, I start laughing. Go figure.

Posted by: Pineapple at September 5, 2006 4:33 PM

I can wink, but only closing my right eye. Can't close my left eye by itself.

Posted by: Zach at September 5, 2006 4:37 PM

I can't snap or whistle for the life of me.

Posted by: Matt at September 5, 2006 4:40 PM

Well.....I know that most girls make up yarns about not being able to fart or belch, but for real- I cannot burp to save my life.
Perhaps it ties in with the fact that I dont' drink any kind of sodas, but who knows?
Either way, it seems to really bother my boyfriend.

I can do the taco, clover, and rolled tongue, as well as winking, snapping my fingers, whistling, and doing the vulcan thing.

I can't, however, cross my eyes

Posted by: NoaAnonymous at September 5, 2006 4:42 PM

I can wink either eye, but my wife is one of those 'half winkers'.. perhaps version 2 of the poll can have a third (half) option.

I can flip the end of my tongue upside-down, but only clockwise (from my perspective). Any attempts to rotate counter-clockwise end in drooling and failure. Can anyone here flip in both directions?

Posted by: MikeU at September 5, 2006 4:44 PM

I have a weird talent that I was told by someone is impossible to do...I can roll my left arm forward while rolling my right arm backward (in the middle in front of me) You know, kind of like when Tina Turner does rolling on the river. Point your first finger and touch them in front of you, then start rolling. Most people end up with both arms going the same direction. Either clockwise or counter clockwise. I can keep them both going for quite a long time, one clockwise and one counter clockwise. But I can't make farting noises with my armpits, burp on command or wiggle my ears. I also can't turn my eyelids inside out, and my sister can. Bummer.

Posted by: Amy at September 5, 2006 4:49 PM

I am also one of those people that can only wink one eye I have to admit so for a long time I just said wink wink instead of actually winking. The other thing I can't do is move my eyebrows independantly of one other it's an all or nothing show for me.

Posted by: Suzie at September 5, 2006 4:53 PM

I'm 32 and never learned to whistle. I didn't learn to snap my fingers until I was 28 or so. I can only do that on my right hand.

Posted by: Super Pup at September 5, 2006 4:58 PM

I can't whistle.

Posted by: Amber at September 5, 2006 4:59 PM

I was born with a lazy eye, almost completely shut, so I can't wink at all.

I'm also one of those people who can't whistle really, or much of any of those sorts of things. I can burp on command, and roll my tongue, thats about it.

Posted by: David at September 5, 2006 5:00 PM

I want to marry nursie

Posted by: Troutopia at September 5, 2006 5:01 PM

I can wink with both eyes...at the same time. Skills right there, Steve.

Alas, I can't whistle.

Posted by: Kaylee at September 5, 2006 5:03 PM

So does this mean if you poke them in one eye they're blind?

I can blink, roll my R's, roll my tongue, and wiggle my ears, but I can't whistle.

Posted by: Gg at September 5, 2006 5:09 PM

I cannot see the 3-d image in one of those "Magic Eye" pictures. I have tried & tried, but no dice.

(but I can wink, raise one eyebrow, roll my tongue, whistle, yada yada yada)

Posted by: Rhonda at September 5, 2006 5:20 PM

My husband, 6-year old daughter, and I can all wink. However, my 11-year-old daughter can't.

Posted by: AJ at September 5, 2006 5:21 PM

I am unable to engage in Homosexual Sex

Posted by: Dilip Doshi at September 5, 2006 5:24 PM

I can't whistle, except around a blade of grass.

Posted by: C at September 5, 2006 5:31 PM

p.s., yes, no whistling... but funny, I have no problem with homosexual sex. Or, at least, that's what the gay-married-wife tells me.

Posted by: C at September 5, 2006 5:34 PM

I am physically unable to do a cartwheel. In my traumatic days of a small, parochial grade school, seven us tried out for cheerleading. Six of us made it. Guess who was left out?

I am also physically bad at sports, in general. Years after the scarring cheerleading incident, I tried out for summer league girls' softball when I was about 10 or 11. My own teammates would "boo" me when I came up to bat.

That pretty much ended my career in sports and cheerleading. But later? When I started the school on fire? Yeah, THEN I showed 'em what for. Sigh. Too bad that was only a dream...

Posted by: Cacti to Cornfields at September 5, 2006 5:53 PM

my grandpa cannot fully supinate either hand. if you hold your hands in front of you with the palms down, most everyone can spin the hand so the palm is up-like you are catching rain. my grandpa's hands stop at the half way point, so they are vertical and not catching anything.

Posted by: deena at September 5, 2006 5:57 PM

here's a fun genetic thing: hold your hands in front of you so you can see the palms. now make your pinky and thumb touch each other like you are making a 3 sign, but smoosh them together tight- like you are trying to hold a piece of paper between them. now bend your wrist so your hands come a little closer to you. do you get a little tendon to pop out on your wrist? i only have one on the right. some have both, some have none.

Posted by: d at September 5, 2006 6:02 PM

I cannot cross my eyes or roll my toungue. I can wink though.

Posted by: justine at September 5, 2006 6:02 PM

I am also a mutuant half winker! I can wink ok with my left eye. To wink the right one, I have to hold the right one open and contort my face, with my mouth half open. And that's not winking, that's just creepy.

Posted by: kim at September 5, 2006 6:06 PM

I am so glad there are other people that can't burp either. When I do burp, it totally sneaks up on me and and at really random times. It's embarrasing.

I also have trouble whistling. I can only whistle by sucking air in, not by blowing air out. That sounds vaguely vulgar.

Posted by: allison at September 5, 2006 6:12 PM

I believe your sample was biased. Were those two related? (or more appropriately, were their parents related?)

no offense to your pals, of course.

I cannot touch my tongue to the tip of my nose. But I hear curling one's tongue is a 'selective' skill...

Posted by: slickaphonic at September 5, 2006 6:14 PM

Everything I can think to say has been said, except this: One thing that almost everyone CAN'T do except for a select few is roll your tongue WITHOUT the help of your lips or teeth. So, you can't use either to hold your tongue. Try it.
Also, no kidding: my best friend can lick her elbow.

Posted by: hannah at September 5, 2006 6:15 PM

I can fold my tonge and keep it folded without using my lips or teeth.

Posted by: Alec at September 5, 2006 6:39 PM

I can't cross my eyes or burp on demand.

Posted by: Stacy at September 5, 2006 7:13 PM

I can't satisfy a woman

Posted by: Mark at September 5, 2006 7:44 PM

I can't whistle at all! Or roll my R's...or wink for that matter...But I can roll my tongue!

Posted by: Heather at September 5, 2006 7:45 PM

I can twitch my nose like a rabbit. I'm the only person I know who can do this and I try to get other people to do it all the time--they usualy just end up wrinkling up thier noses--it's funny. Other such oddities are being able to wiggle ears and voluntarily move your scalp (without raising your eyebrows)

Posted by: Rael North at September 5, 2006 8:16 PM

I can only raise my left eyebrow. I'm not even sure I'm really raising it, because it seems like I'm just lowering my right eyebrow to make the left one look elevated.

I cannot whistle AT ALL.

Interesting talent: my husband's and oldest daughter's kneecaps appear to bend backwards when they stand with their knees locked.

Posted by: Sleepless Mama at September 5, 2006 8:20 PM

I can wink, snap (Though much better with my left hand), whistle pretty well, and roll up my tongue, and twist my tongue upside-down.

I can only arch an eyebrow if I scrunch the other side of my face (Which usually gives the desired facial expression anyway), and can only do the Vulcan greeting if I use my other hand to help. (I can hold it after I use my other hand though.)

I cannot wiggle my nose, ears, or any of that however.

Posted by: Tom at September 5, 2006 8:21 PM

I can't roll my tongue. I also can't do that raspberry thing where you stick your tongue out and make a farty noise. I can spread out all of my toes like I'm trying to indicate the number 5. I can also pick up stuff with my toes and carry it around. I can hold a pen with my toes, but I haven't been able to write anything legible. My sister and I used to do walk around in flip-flops with our toes all spread out because her best friend thought we were freaks of nature for being able to spread our toes out like monkeys. It really grossed her out for some reason.

Posted by: Deedee at September 5, 2006 8:22 PM

well, i cannot move my pinky fingers independently of my ring fingers.

it's like my hands are retarded.

Posted by: angela at September 5, 2006 8:30 PM

i can wink
i can spread my toes far apart and even wrap the first two around large pipes (handy for climbing)

i CANT snap my fingers--when i try i get a really small, weak sound.
i can't roll my tongue on a normal basis--but once in awhile i can. it's weird.

i also can't dance. is that a simple phsyical action?

Posted by: thy at September 5, 2006 9:08 PM

I can wiggle my ears and nose, roll my eyebrows in both directions, wink independently, whistle, do the Vulcan all manner of finger together/apart combinations (learning the violin and piano was good for something!), pat the head rub the tummy and vice versa.

What can't I do? Roll my tongue. I think it's because I have a short, fat tongue. Same reason I can't tie a knot in a cherry stem.

Oh, and I cannot turn a cartwheel. Hate going upside down. It seems like everyone else in the world has turned a cartwheel at some point except me. Some days that ability would be nice. And I never learned to breathe properly when swimming. I figure what the hell. I got the reversible rolling eyebrows thing to get me through.

Posted by: san antone rose at September 5, 2006 9:40 PM

Hey...on the ear wiggling thing. Can anyone move the ears themselves? Like the actual cartilage?

My ears wiggle but only because I can concentrate on that part of my skin around the ear and make IT move. Oh, no. Does this count as "ear wiggling?" Am I down one talent?

I think I'll roll my eyebrows all day tomorrow. See if anyone approaches me at the reference desk. Maybe I can get someone roped into an eyebrow rolling contest.

Posted by: san antone rose at September 5, 2006 9:47 PM

I can Wink, roll my tongue, snap, do the vulcan greeting, do the eyebrow thing, and wiggle my ears, all that right and left handed, faced etc.

But I cannot for the life of me make that face Lucy makes on "I love Lucy" where her mouth goes all slanted, has anyone mentioned that? I've tried and tried, but the result is usually people laughing at me. My Neighbor can do it, and it drives me nuts.

Posted by: Lance at September 5, 2006 10:20 PM

I can move my eyes independent of one another... I can cross either one in, and leave the other one staring straight or move it in/out, up/down, wherever.

If that's not the sexiest thing you've ever heard of, I don't know what is. I'm still single, fellas.

Posted by: missykissy at September 5, 2006 10:37 PM

i can raise one eyebrow at a time!
most of these things are just muscle training, i think, but i know tongues are genetic. i can do that too. thing is, id feel more proud if i couldnt roll my tongue - thats the one thats recessive and more rare.

oh, and i can wink. hey steve, i think your whole feeling special thing has been shot to pieces. unless all the people who cant wink are just too scared to admit it.

Posted by: Laura at September 5, 2006 10:45 PM

I can't raise one eyebrow, anyone who can is like a god to me

Posted by: Nic at September 5, 2006 11:37 PM

I can wink either eye. Early on in my winking career, I could only wink my left eye. I had to train myself to wink my right eye, and can now wink equally with both. I can wiggle my ears. I can roll my tongue into a tube, and turn it over both left and right. I can barely whistle. I can flare my nostrils. I can snap my fingers. I can lift my left eyebrow by itself, but I cannot lift my right eyebrow by itself. I can also do the Vulcan greeting, alternating it with shifting my middle and ring fingers together, creating two "V"s, and then back to the original Vulcan greeting.

Besides wiggling my ears, I can also make my scalp move front to back like I'm wearing a wig that keeps slipping around.

Oh, and my elbows hyperextend.

Posted by: Victoria at September 5, 2006 11:53 PM

Ican do something nobody else can. Touch their right elbow with my right hand!

I thought the r rolling would be just me. I had a helluva time in spanish class because of it.


My science teacher in junior high insisted that rolling your tongue in a tube is genetic. I disliked him so much that I decided to train myself to do it. Took about three months but I can do it now. The vulcan hand signal took me almost a year.

Posted by: Annetteski at September 6, 2006 12:29 AM

I can wink, snap, rub my tummy and pat my head at the same time....but I can't roll my Rs....I just can't go RRRRRRRRR....but I CAN roll my eyes to the back of my head and look like Storm from X-Men...though I'd much rather look more like Halle Berry...

Posted by: Chris at September 6, 2006 12:32 AM

I can't whistle, in and way shape or form, or wriggle my ears, but I can raise one eyebrow (my right one, my left eyebrow only wiggles feebly), roll my tongue three different ways, wink with both eyes, make the vulcan hand gesture, cross my eyes, roll my R's, snap my fingers, flip my bottom lip over, and I can snort like a pig and my nostrils flare of they're own accord (neither of which is really that good a thing). My eyebrow also raises of it's own accord... which has got me into trouble on occasion... After years of failed attemts, I have finally learnt how to swallow pills. In my defense, it's alot harder than it looks.

Posted by: Kayla at September 6, 2006 1:11 AM

I CAN wink, snap my fingers, wiggle my ears, spit with the gland underneath my tongue, flare my nostrils, whistle with or without fingers, do the vulcan salute (both hands), roll my Rs, roll my tongue, lift both eyebrows independently, cross my eyes, umm... I think that's it.

Oh, I can also burp on demand and sometimes uncontrollably when I have the hiccups. So, it's like... hiccup, burp... long pause... hiccup, burp... long pause, etc.

And finally, under the right conditions, I can unleash a bowel-loosening belch. Not my own bowel, mind you.

Posted by: Brett at September 6, 2006 1:14 AM

I can't piss if I can hear other human beings. Footsteps, voices, breathing, other people peeing, whatever. I can't do it.

Posted by: Lawrence at September 6, 2006 1:46 AM

I'm lefthanded.

Posted by: Aaron at September 6, 2006 3:39 AM

I can wink, snap, raise one eyebrow, raise my hands in the air like I just don't care.......but my 6 year old daughter CANNOT blow her nose. Cold season is hell.

Posted by: Crystal at September 6, 2006 4:18 AM

I can do all of the usual stuff--rolling r's, rolling tongue, inquisitive eyebrow, blah, blah, blah. I cannot, however, "gleek" on command like my brother. You know--the squirting saliva that launches from under your tongue at inoportune moments to spray unsuspecting tablemates. My brother could squirt hapless victims from 5 feet away...I always envied that ability for some insane reason. Huh.

Posted by: Loni at September 6, 2006 4:20 AM

Armpit fart.

Posted by: DogStarMan at September 6, 2006 4:38 AM

I can't roll my r's which is the source of entertainment for my brothers who both can roll their r's and sometimes, jokingly of course, use it as a password to exclude me from activities with them. I always try to prove to them that I'm not the only one ...

Posted by: Melanie at September 6, 2006 5:12 AM

I can wink, both eyes seperately. I can tap dance to Freebird. I can whistle Dixie while I sit on a crik bank and and can't catch fish. I pronounce Washington as Worshington and creek as crik. I can eat with my mouth open.

I cannot properly pronounce funeral. I say something silly like, froonrul or foonreal.

I can bite my toenails.

Posted by: Mearl at September 6, 2006 5:14 AM

I can wink with one eye... And raise my left eyebrow. And whistle a passable tune. Can't wolf whistle though, with my fingers in my mouth. Hmm, what else does my repertoire run to...? I can roll my tongue. (And my Rs) Can't do the armpit thing, or touch my nose with my tongue. Can snap the fingers on my right hand but not my left. Ooh, I can cross my toes!! But only some of them. :p Um... I can cross my eyes. Can't wiggle my ears.

What *is* a Vulcan greeting? I'm sorry, I'm not a Trekkie and I'm too young to remember that! Is it the V shape with your four fingers? Because that's easy...

Can't um.. spit with my tongue gland though. Never really found that to be an immense problem in life, though!

Posted by: Roxie at September 6, 2006 5:16 AM

I have trouble breathing underwater

Posted by: gromit at September 6, 2006 5:19 AM

LOL...Tap dance to Freebird??? I can also bite my toenails. I don't, but I can, if the need arises.

I cannot wink, but can get both legs behind my head. My husband loves that.

I can whistle with a blade of grass between my thumbs, but not the regular way.

That tongue squirty, spitty thing is so gross. I broke up with a guy because he did that in a restaurant.

Posted by: Darla at September 6, 2006 5:29 AM

I can make my fingers walk across pages of yellow paper. I can do this with both hands, but not at the same time.

Posted by: Allen at September 6, 2006 5:36 AM

i can wink

but
can't snap
can't whistle
can't raise just one eyebrow

Posted by: pete at September 6, 2006 5:37 AM

I can wiggle my ears. Not uncommon, but I can wiggle each independantly of the other, which I'm told is.

Posted by: Crystalwren at September 6, 2006 5:53 AM

I'm physically unable to eat boiled okra.

Posted by: Adam at September 6, 2006 6:08 AM

I have another one. Not sure what you'd call it, but try to put your middle finger over your index finger, ring finger over your middle finger, and your pinkie over your ring finger. All at the same time.

Lobster claw?

Again, I credit the piano. It was a cruel, cruel mistress.

Posted by: san antone rose at September 6, 2006 6:11 AM

My wife can't raise one eyebrow while leaving the other neutral. The raised-eyebrow look is classic, I never knew anyone couldn't do it. However, she can roll her tongue both ways (yes, you can roll your tongue both front-to-back and side-to-side) and clover her tongue (folding all four ways at once).

Posted by: Jordan at September 6, 2006 6:20 AM

anyone who can't wink i feel really sorry for"how do you get a girls attention from across the room?"

Posted by: jeef at September 6, 2006 6:27 AM

I can wink. I however can not whistle, perform a simple cart-wheel (my size has nothing to do with it just fear of eating dirt with a combination of bad coordination), raise a single eyebrow, and up til a year ago could not snap my fingers either. What a feeling of accomplishment let me tell ya! It's never bothered me...just been another quirk of mine I guess you could say =)

Posted by: Stacey at September 6, 2006 6:33 AM

I can wink with both eyes, raise my left eyebrow, wiggle my ears without moving anything else, do the Vulcan sign, whistle normally, and whistle quite beautifully through my teeth.....and also shake my eyeballs. This scares most people when I do it, though. My brother can also shake his eyeballs.

The one thing I can't do, and have always wanted to, is the awesomely loud two-finger whistle.

Posted by: Jenna at September 6, 2006 6:35 AM

i can't roll my r's
i can't whistle either
but i can roll my tongue into a tube and a clover

Posted by: Emily at September 6, 2006 6:44 AM

I can wink. I can roll my tongue into a tube, but not the clover. I can belch on command using the air suction technique. I can make the vulcan hand V jawn wit both hands. But probably most interestingly: i can move my left ear back and forward freely. But only the left. In order to move my right i have to move the left first, and then moving the right pulls at my eyebrows.. It's like there's some strange muscle connectivity goin on on the right side of my head. I am a freak.

Posted by: Jakaricat1 at September 6, 2006 7:11 AM

can't roll my R's
can't play any musical instrument (well)

can spin basketball on my finger
can whistle 4 different ways

Posted by: nardbagman at September 6, 2006 7:14 AM

I can whistle...sort of. Kinda monotone. My wife and her father can whistle very well, showtunes people, showtunes.
I can snap fingers on both hands, can wink both eyes, but can't raise a single eyebrow to save my life.
I can wiggle my ears, but can't do the nose twitching thing (does nostril flaring count?).
I can roll my tongue, but not the cloverleaf thing.
I am able to do both the Vulcan greeting and something I like to call the Vulcan good by wave (second and third fingers stuck together in the middle and first and fourth apart from second and third).

Posted by: Dave at September 6, 2006 7:29 AM


I can not roll my Rs, which is a shame because of my Scottish ancestry. Perhaps in Scotland this would be considered a speech impediment.

But, I have a double jointed pinky finger on both hands!

Posted by: Johnny John John at September 6, 2006 7:38 AM

I have no problem winking, but my brother is forced to wink both eyes whenever he tries. If that can even be called winking. He just doesn't have independant control of each eye. Just one of those mysteries I guess.

Posted by: Matt at September 6, 2006 7:44 AM

I can gleat. (Contract the saliva gland under my tongue to release a rapid-fire stream of spit) Gross...but oh well

Posted by: Jordan at September 6, 2006 7:45 AM

I can't whistle.

I had to try really hard to learn how to snap, think I was 12 before I figured it out.

Can't raise one eye brow.

Can't pop my knuckles. . .really won't even try, too painful.

Posted by: Marie at September 6, 2006 8:01 AM

My girlfriend is the only person I've ever met who can't do a raspberry. It's highly amusing to watch her try. She just kind of sticks her tounge out and blows across it, making this horrible wet, raspy sound. But it's not the least bit flatulent sounding, as a true raspberry should be. She can't whistle either, but that appears to be pretty common considering the comments I've seen so far.

Posted by: drperky at September 6, 2006 8:03 AM

I can make a three leaf clover out of my tongue, and so can my sister. I've never known anyone else who can do it. It makes a great party trick!

Posted by: Jenn at September 6, 2006 8:09 AM

Some people can wiggle their ears. I can "wiggle" my nostrils... flare them I guess it's called... dunno... never met anyone else who could do it.

Posted by: Jim at September 6, 2006 8:10 AM

What about nostril flaring? That was one that took me years to master, altho it would sometimes happen on its own. Now I avoid it cause I have 48 years of nasal hair bristling in there, posting an inpenetrable guard from booger seeking digits.
I can do all the other stuff, except that I can only raise my left eyebrow or both. the right one seems to be stapled in place when I try to raise it.

Posted by: ack don't look at September 6, 2006 8:11 AM

I can't bend my pinky fingers past the midway point without the finger next to it (ring finger) bending as well.

Posted by: goose at September 6, 2006 8:17 AM

Ahh.. gleeking unsuspecting losers.. Good times... Good times

Posted by: me again at September 6, 2006 8:33 AM

I'm pretty sure that my latent squint causes my eye crossing disability.

Only my left eye moves in towards my nose, my right eye remains where it is, actually, I'm doing it now, and I can move my right eye around while the left one stays firmly crossed.. I can take a picture if you like ;)

Posted by: Kez at September 6, 2006 8:33 AM

I can't whistle and I can't spread my toes like a monkey.

Posted by: Laine at September 6, 2006 8:43 AM

I can pass gas on command .... I cannot perform the dirty deed if there is a clown in the room

Posted by: keb at September 6, 2006 8:46 AM

hey steve, you need to add a "sometimes" option to your poll, because i can wink when i am not trying really hard, and only with the one eye! so SOMETIMES i can wink!

Posted by: Krista at September 6, 2006 8:53 AM

I can lick my elbow -- always a good party trick. If you think this sounds like no big deal, well, just try it.

Posted by: Erin at September 6, 2006 8:57 AM

I can't whistle. But I'm suspicious of the high number of winkers. I am sure that many of hte winkers only think they can wink. How many of the women out there can wink their clits?

Posted by: jamesnolan at September 6, 2006 9:08 AM

I am completely incapable of burping. It's very sad and sometimes painful. I'm hoping that, at least, one day I will explode.

Posted by: Abbie at September 6, 2006 9:49 AM

I can't think of anything that I can't do right now..but whenever I get the sun glare in my eyes I sneeze..is pretty funny..

Posted by: jeica at September 6, 2006 9:53 AM

I can wink, but it took practice. Same with snapping. But, I can't whistle to save my life.

Posted by: Renee at September 6, 2006 9:57 AM

Some people think they can wink, but they can't. I have a friend who would "wink" at me all the time, but in fact he was "winking" both eyes at the same time and he just didn't get it.

Posted by: Jeanene at September 6, 2006 9:58 AM

Although I can wink with both eyes, raise either of my eyebrows (individually), and wiggle my ears... I can't whistle (with or without fingers in my mouth). I've always wanted to whistle using a blade of grass. Just can't.

Posted by: Jeniene at September 6, 2006 10:01 AM

My son CAN touch his nose with his tongue. Was is just a local thing around Pittsburgh where I grew up, or was that the accepted international test for mental retardation?

He wasn't so happy about his skill after I told him about that and it strengthened my belief in the time-honored test.

Posted by: Pat at September 6, 2006 10:07 AM

I can also fart on command -Keb .. somtimes though you have to be careful for "accidents" ..

I as well am freaked out by clowns - 1 question though .. why are u having sex with a clown in the room ?

Posted by: edward at September 6, 2006 10:22 AM

I can raise either eyebrow independently of the other, even to the tune of a song to the pleasure of my kids.

Posted by: Jason at September 6, 2006 10:23 AM

I was never able to make a tube out of my tongue until I became determined to learn. I squashed my lips together and stuck out my tongue until it curved ever so slightly. I did that for a long time until I developed the muscle control, now it does it on its own! its not nearly as glamorous as everyone else's natural ability, but it will be. My boyfriend also taught him self to raise either eyebrow in a similar matter, he held one down and then raised the other. now he's an ambi-lifter!
YOU CAN BE TAUGHT

Posted by: Amanda at September 6, 2006 10:26 AM

According to your poll we're all a bunch of liars!

Posted by: sandy at September 6, 2006 10:48 AM

I can wink, roll my tongue, flip my eye lids etc.. but the one thing I can do that I have never seen anyone else able to is swallow my tongue. I can put it down my throat and also up over the top into my nasal cavity. Weirds people out and is a great party trick!

Posted by: Brian at September 6, 2006 10:59 AM

some people can't flare their nostrils. freakin' losers.

Posted by: adam at September 6, 2006 11:00 AM

I am a "fake-winker". I turn my head a bit sideways and it appears that I am winking at you, but I really can't wink at all. I can only whistle through my bottom two teeth, which makes it pretty off-key if I am trying to do anything more than a wolf-whistle - forget Andy Griffith!

Posted by: Kerry at September 6, 2006 11:07 AM

I can't make myself burp (damn) but in trying to learn to burp, I figured out I can make my stomach growl. Useless.

Posted by: J.A. Johnson at September 6, 2006 11:15 AM

Can only wink my left eye

Posted by: AuĂ°ur at September 6, 2006 11:27 AM

I wink stronger with my left eye than my right -- when I want to wink the right, I really have to focus on keeping the left open.

Also, I can't roll my tongue, touch it to my nose, put my elbow in my ear, or slam dunk.

Posted by: Mo at September 6, 2006 11:29 AM

I cannot whistle even if it were to save my life. I've tried and tried. "Put your lips together and blow." I wanna shoot people when they say that. I have accepted the fact that I will never be able to do it but sometimes when I'm feeling silly, I still try.

I can wink though.

Posted by: Criscipline at September 6, 2006 11:46 AM

I can do both - roll my tongue and touch my nose with my tongue. I have two sisters, one can roll her tongue and the other can not. I'm the only one in my family can touch their nose with their tongue. Maybe I'm adopted.

Posted by: Kelly at September 6, 2006 11:56 AM

gleek - y
wink - y
roll tongue - y
walk + chew gum - y
flare nostrils - y
wiggle ears - y
flare pecs - y
dial-a-fart - n
roll Rs - n (the most disappointing)
Cameron's water droplet - y

but, color blind...so -10 for that

Posted by: whitelabel at September 6, 2006 11:58 AM

I forgot to add - both my sisters can whistle and I can't.

Posted by: Kelly at September 6, 2006 11:58 AM

Steve, don't feel alone in the rolling of the R's. Definatly can't do that.

So that makes the "sexy purrrrrr" an un-option for me to use at the bar.

Damn it. I guess I'll just have to rely on my gender.

Posted by: Brandy at September 6, 2006 12:04 PM

I can't roll my tongue. My wife can't spread her toes, but then she was born pigeon-toed and spent a few years of her childhood in splints.

Posted by: Jordan at September 6, 2006 12:07 PM

Oh, I also cannot burp. Weird, I know.

I've never burped in my life. Just these little hiccup things.

Posted by: Brandy at September 6, 2006 12:08 PM

I can't blow up balloons. No idea why - I just can't do it to save my life.

The same deficiency crushed my dreams of fame and fortune as a kazoo player.

Posted by: Alex at September 6, 2006 12:19 PM

I can't cry at country songs :(

Posted by: LouLou at September 6, 2006 12:47 PM

I can't belch (but can fart like a champ)
I also can't taste phenylthiocarbamide. (According to http://www.genetics.utah.edu/news/sc6press26.html Three-quarters of all people can taste PTC.)

Posted by: Diana at September 6, 2006 12:55 PM

Oooo---
I also cant whistle thru a piece of split grass. Made me the loser at camp.

Posted by: Diana at September 6, 2006 12:56 PM

I can wink both eyes, do the Vulcan greeting, roll my R's, roll up my tongue in a ball, wiggle my ears, snap AND turn my tongue upside down...but after all that I still can't touch my tongue to my nose and I'll spend HOURS trying to do it, knowing that despite what I try (pulling my tongue and so-forth), it will never happen. Depressing thought, isn't it?

Posted by: Aaron at September 6, 2006 1:07 PM

I can't raise one eyebrow. My brother can raise each brow individually, so I always said that he stold mine.

Posted by: Victoria at September 6, 2006 1:13 PM

I can blow air out of my eye. Gross, I know! It usually happens by accident when I am blowing my nose really hard or something, but I can make it happen too.
I can't flare my nostrils which I know a great deal of people can.

Posted by: Annette at September 6, 2006 1:24 PM

I can't listen to emo music.

Posted by: Jacob at September 6, 2006 1:44 PM

Although I voted as a yes on winkability, I am only a 50% winker. I can wink with my right, but I can not (not matter how hard I try) wink with my left - something that my husband finds hilarious.
;-)

Other talents I lack or suck at - I can't roll my Rs and can barely whistle. And yes, I have had many, many people try to teach me to learn.

Posted by: kyenta at September 6, 2006 1:48 PM

I'm unable to wank. :-(

But I can roll my eyeballs (together or independently), snap my fingers, whistle and do the vulcan greeting, too. :-)

Posted by: Mark at September 6, 2006 2:24 PM

I cannot tell the difference between bitter and sour... my husband has done experiment after experiment to try and show me the difference (crushed up paracetemol tablets vs a teaspoon of vinegar for e.g.), and I just can't see what he's getting at - they all just taste unpalatable to me, but not different. I suspect it's all a conspiracy and bitter/sour is the same thing.

Posted by: Em at September 6, 2006 2:27 PM

I can wiggle the index toe on my right foot without moving any of the other toes.

I can't do the left one though.

I knew a kid who could blow perfect little bubbles of his tongue. He looked like a freak for weaks on end blowing on the end of his tongue. But he could do it eventually.

and he could catch and throw his farts.

Posted by: Dull Blade at September 6, 2006 2:39 PM

I can roll my R's, wink with both eyes, move each eyebrow independantly, turn my tongue over and flare my nostrils. I cannot touch my tongue to my nose or chin, move my ears, move my pupils extremely fast from side to side (some people have a certain muscle in their eyes that does it), or whistle.

Posted by: Brittany at September 6, 2006 2:57 PM

all this stuff is pretty common but so far I am the only person i know that can hold one eye still and move the other one around then can switch and do the other eye

Posted by: scott at September 6, 2006 3:18 PM

I can wink with either eye easily. I can "live long and prosper" with either hand, and do the reverse just as well (jewish blessing and hand position).

Where's the final update on the tree brain???

Posted by: tokenblogger at September 6, 2006 3:29 PM

I can not whistle, people that are really good have tried to teach me, but I am convinced that I phsyically can not do it.

Posted by: Joy at September 6, 2006 4:02 PM

I can't roll my R's. I can gurgle a lot, and that usually fools people. But inside I know I'm just a fake, and it rots my very soul. :(

Posted by: Steven at September 6, 2006 4:12 PM

I can suck my upper lip up to my nose. No one else in my family can do this...My husband (lovingly?) refers to said lip and Monkey Lip.

Posted by: hulagirl at September 6, 2006 4:12 PM

wink - 1/2
roll tongue - Y
flare nostrils - N
wiggle ears - N
wiggle pecs - Y
burp on command - Y
burp most of alphabet in one breath - N
roll r's - Y

My son can put his arm behind him and reach up and touch his ear.

Posted by: AKA Anthony Clifton at September 6, 2006 4:13 PM

I forgot to say I can not move my eyebrows individually, it's either all or nothing.

I can not do the Elvis lip.

I rock at the Vulcan "live long and prosper", I can even move the fingers around individually while keeping the other ones still.

But I CAN turn my foot around 180 degrees. But I can't quite make the full 180 if i do them at the same time. It's pretty neat, I've never met anyone else that can do this. I am super proud.

Posted by: Joy at September 6, 2006 4:17 PM

After spotting a comment further up, I have spent the last hour attempting to lick my own elbow.

The result?? A neck cramp and a bone dry elbow.

*cry*

Posted by: Roxie at September 6, 2006 4:40 PM

It seems wierd to me that people can't do any of these things. I can plug my nose with my upper lip when I swim. I can flip my tongue over, both ways. I can make it "do the wave" too. I whistle wierd. I move the tip of my tongue a certain way, then I blow through it at the back of my top front teeth. It makes a whistle sound, then I use my big 'ol lips to alter the pitch. Doesn't sound real good though. Snap, wiggle ears, wink, etc. no problem.

I can only do the Elvis lip with one side.

Posted by: Dick Woodcock at September 6, 2006 4:53 PM

I don't think raising one eyebrow is genetic, because used to not be able to do it, but I practiced a lot and now I can.

Same for independant ear movement.

Wow, that sounds lame.

Posted by: Jake at September 6, 2006 5:12 PM

I can wink, but only with my right eye. I can raise my eyebrow, but only my left one. I can do the Vulcan sign easily with both hands, as well as the 'reverse Vulcan' (two middle fingers together and pinky and index out). I can roll my tongue and move it around rapid fire, which I haven't found an occasion to use but it looks pretty cool. I can snap with both hands, but I cannot whistle. Period. As my friend pointed out, I do an awesome Elvis lip, apparently when I'm confused or disgusted about something. Oh yes, and I am particularly excellent at nostril flaring. I'm so proud.

Posted by: Allison at September 6, 2006 5:20 PM

I can bend six of my fingers at the top knuckle. It's totally bizarro.

Posted by: Stephanie at September 6, 2006 5:28 PM

To the guy who said rolling your tongue is genetic.. a friend of mine couldn't do it when she was 12, but decided to teach herself and now she can.. does that mean she had the genetics but didn't have the knowledge, or is it nothing to do with genetics?

i wouldn't mind seeing a tongue rolling poll next steve :]

Posted by: James at September 6, 2006 5:28 PM

I just wanted to be able to post a comment on the sneeze because its so awesome!

toiunge rooling is genetic.. we did it in maths.. and you cant learn so maybe that girl is an exception.

Posted by: Samantha at September 6, 2006 5:37 PM

i can wink with either eye. i'm doubly blessed. but i can't whistle.

Posted by: rob at September 6, 2006 7:04 PM

I cannot look at Carnival helpers (carnies).
Just one glimpse of a carnie and I turn into a blithering mess.

I am also unable to shake a dogs paw.

Posted by: Dilip Doshi at September 6, 2006 7:38 PM

To knives: I also can turn both my arms around 360 degrees, this is the first time I've heard of anyone else being able to do it.

I also can bend all of my fingers backwards and forwards, dislocate almost any bone I can think of, and do this weird popping thing (not knuckles) with all my fingers that makes them look like they're under a strobe light. And I can turn my feet and elbows completely backwards. Oh, AND I can blow bubbles and whistle out of my tear ducts, just like those people who squirt the milk out of them. I'm just a freak of nature.

Posted by: Emily at September 6, 2006 7:52 PM

I can wink (both eyes), flare my nostrils but no nose twitch, wiggle my ears, blow-whistle, suck-whistle and bird-whistle (using tongue, front teeth and roof of the mouth - but not the loud one with fingers), can roll my RRRRRs, view cross-eye and parallel-eye stereograms, do the vulcan salute, raise my right eyebrow (but not the left), snap my fingers, and pick up coins with my toes.

I'm left-handed but since I learned the Mac using the mouse on the right side, I can write with both hands, but the right side is mirror-backwards.

I can't roll my tongue but can make a 'taco' shape, can't touch my nose to tongue. Can't lick elbow although I just hurt myself trying. Thanksalot.

I can count with my fingers unless I've had a SUGARED DRINK in the last 48 hours. I just learned this last year.

Thanks for letting me share. I finally feel clean.

Posted by: willc2 at September 6, 2006 8:01 PM

I can raise my eyebrows independantly. I've noted that some here can only raise one.

Posted by: o'really at September 6, 2006 8:06 PM

I'm a goddam elf. I can snap, crackle and pop.

Posted by: Igor at September 6, 2006 8:40 PM

I can move my eyes independantly of each other, and my jaw pops every single time I ope it, loud enough for others to hear, I don't have hair between my second and third knuckles

Posted by: Becky at September 6, 2006 8:51 PM

I can twist my tongue any which way, wiggle ears, raise eyebrows independently, snap, whistle and move all fingers and toes independently. I cannot touch my tongue to my nose, but I can reach my chin with the tip. I can do the cherry stem thing. I cannot roll my Rs (bad because my native language demands it). I too get the mouth tickle when I try. I gave up trying to do the finger cab whistle thing.

My husband cannot blow bubbles with chewing gum and instead accidentally launches the wad of gum.

Posted by: Ru at September 6, 2006 8:58 PM

I can wink both eyes (independently, not blinking), I can raise either eyebrow (independently), I can do the Vulcan hand thing with either hand, I can do the Bewitched nose thing, a bunny nose wiggle, and can flare my nostrils at will. I can also roll my tongue, and I used to be able to roll my r's, but then I had my uvula removed and lost the ability. Can't wiggle my ears tho.

Posted by: emmalish at September 6, 2006 9:19 PM

I can't snap my fingers, no matter how hard I try. :-(

Posted by: Heather at September 6, 2006 9:43 PM

I can't whistle. It torments me.

Posted by: katy at September 6, 2006 9:47 PM

I'm a skillful winker; either eye with no other facial distortion caused by the wink. I can snap my fingers, I can do the Vulcan greeting, I can roll my tongue, touch my nose with my tongue, and fold my tongue into three little scallops (kind of looks like a clover). I can bend just the tip of all my fingers (keep them straight, and bend just the end joint.) I can flare my nostrils, I can snap my fingers, and if it matters at all put my foot next to my head.

However I can not whistle for the life of me. Or raise one eyebrow, or roll my r's, or wiggle my ears/nose.

Posted by: Arsenic at September 6, 2006 10:28 PM

I cannot snap or say the words "hockey" and "spoon" correctly. However I CAN dislocate my hips, put three loops into my tounge, and cross only one eye at a time. I like to believe that these more than make up for what I can't do.

Posted by: Jess at September 6, 2006 10:38 PM

I can do the vulcan salute, raise my eyebrows independantly, roll my tongue, wink, snap my fingers, flare my nostrils, wiggle my ears, and a bunch of other stuff, but...

...my boyfriend can burp "I love you", which eclipses any of my talents by a pretty significant margin.

Posted by: Emma at September 6, 2006 11:32 PM

I can't automatically do the Tupac 'Westsiiiiide' greeting with my left hand for some reason, my middle fingers just won't cooperate... but I can throw it up righty in 1 second

Posted by: Steve at September 7, 2006 12:12 AM

For the life of me, I can never whistle.

Posted by: ade at September 7, 2006 1:22 AM

I can turn my head completely around 360 degrees.

I can crawl across a ceiling.

I can levitate.

I can talk with 666 different voices. (At the same time)

For the life of me, I can't stand green pea soup.

Posted by: Meagan at September 7, 2006 2:02 AM

my dad can wiggle each ear independently, which is fairly creepy/cool. I can't do it, nor can I raise my eyebrows independently. also, I can only do the vulcan hand greeting with my left hand.

I'm a pretty mean whistler, though.

Posted by: adam at September 7, 2006 6:20 AM

I was never able to roll my Rs either, but i taught myself, and now i do it all the time, despite the fact that noone in my family is able to.
The same thing happened with clicking, it took a while to train myself to do these things, but it turns out it is possible.

However, no matter how hard i try, i just can't raise one eyebrow without raising the other...i think this should be my next challenge...

Posted by: Lauren at September 7, 2006 6:28 AM

I can wink, roll my tongue, snap, raise my right eyebrow alone, both together, do the Vulcan thing and whistle. I can also bend my fingers back so far they practically touch the back of my hands. My husband can wiggle his ears and it freaks me out everytime. But my best "ability" is that I can make the Elvis upper lip with both sides independently. Also can make my bottom lip do it upside down to. That freaks my husband out.

Posted by: Mandy at September 7, 2006 6:55 AM

I can roll my Rs, but only with my tongue on the left side of my mouth. For some reason, this really frustrates me.

Posted by: Tom at September 7, 2006 7:07 AM

I can wink and roll my Rs, but the latter is nothing unusual for a native Dutch speaker. We can make all sorts of crazy sounds.

Posted by: Antoni at September 7, 2006 7:16 AM

I can't frown in real life. I can only frown on the internet. :(

Posted by: Erin at September 7, 2006 8:04 AM

I can't seem to remember to take the garbage out BEFORE the pick-up morning. Seems simple, yes, but the basic task of de-funking the kitchen by removing the garbage so some nice fellows can haul it away is just beyond my capabilities. Sad.

Posted by: Joe at September 7, 2006 9:29 AM

I can beat off with my right hand

Posted by: yo at September 7, 2006 9:39 AM

I can wink, arch a eyebrow, roll my "r"s and snap with both sets of fingers at the same time.

I can also tie a cherry stem into a knot with just my tongue.

Posted by: Lizzie at September 7, 2006 10:15 AM

hey steve!
i JUST found out that 2 of my guy friends always sit down to pee.
i thought this was very surprising.
and a little weird.

and it made me think of this post, and wonder how many other guys sit down to pee.

Posted by: rob at September 7, 2006 10:30 AM

I can not frown...

You know how some people can take their smile and "turn it upside down"... ?

Well I can't...

(sigh) =[

Posted by: Sama Bama at September 7, 2006 10:38 AM

I can wink, but I can't seem to get the taste of penis outta my mouth. :(

Posted by: A sad song about lemons at September 7, 2006 10:51 AM

I just wish you had the option to track whether people could wink both eyes, or just one (and maybe figure out how long people practice)... I can now wink both, but for a long time I could only wink my right eye and getting my left took a good long while (years?)

I have been trying to wriggle my ears and raise just one eyebrow for DECADES now to no avail. I guess I'll just have to cling to the fact that I can roll, flip and touch my tounge to my nose, and roll my Rs Spanish or French style (with tounge vs soft palate).

Posted by: hornhead at September 7, 2006 12:32 PM

I can wink and also wiggle my nostrils like a rabbit wiggles it's nose. My husband tries to copy me but just makes these wierd faces that look like he's surprised about something. awesome.

Posted by: statz_grl at September 7, 2006 12:38 PM

I can only raise my left eyebrow. I think this annoys my other eyebrow because any time I raise my left eyebrow my right one starts feeling funny....... or...... maybe I'm just weird.....

Posted by: Brown Eyed Girl at September 7, 2006 12:47 PM

I can't believe no one has mentioned gleeking! I'm a professional but my kid can't do it.....

Posted by: megchem at September 7, 2006 1:15 PM

i can only wink with my left eye.
someone else beat me to it but i can bend all my fingers at the top knuckle. i can pop out my thumbs too.
i can burp on command, flair my nostrils, cross my eyes and then move around one of them, snap my fingers, roll my r's and tongue, and whistle.
but i can't raise my eyebrows which constantly disappoints me because wrinkling your eyebrows just doesn't have the same effect.

oh yea and i have a friend who can lick her elbow.

Posted by: sam at September 7, 2006 1:49 PM

I can wink both eyes, whistle, flare my nostrils, and roll my tongue. I can raise my right eyebrow by itself, but not the left, and I can do the upper-lip snarl thing (a la Elvis) on the left side but not the right.

My mother can't roll her tongue and neither can my daughter, but they can both do the snarl thing on both sides. My daughter can only wink her left eye.

Posted by: Shylah at September 7, 2006 2:00 PM

I can wink, however It's impossible for me to smile without showing all of my teeth.
This may sound lame, but trust me, even the Tyra Banks method of smiling (as seen on America's Next Top Model) does not stop me from cheesing uncontrollaby

Posted by: Jes at September 7, 2006 2:23 PM

I am the only guy I have ever known who can queef.

Posted by: Big Will at September 7, 2006 2:31 PM

I can wink both eyes, snap, and whistle, but I am a horrible whistler, being both unable to control volume and insanely shrill. My father is the Pavoratti of whistlers, so it's always bugged me that I'm a sub-standard whistler.

I can roll the tongue but not flip it over- I've tried it in the mirror and still can't figure out what the hell I'm doing.

Posted by: DemonNurse at September 7, 2006 2:37 PM

I can roll my tongue and twist it upside down, but only in one direction. I can neither touch my nose with my tongue nor roll my r's (unless I'm saying the word "burrito" for some reason). I can wink but can't arch a single eyebrow. I can pick up objects off the floor with my toes. I cannot wiggle my ears. I can snap but I can't whistle.

Posted by: Ckazaal at September 7, 2006 2:58 PM

I can not snap my fingers, or touch my toes... Is this pathetic? I can't wink, snap or touch my toes. I have no mad skillz, no boy will ever want me... *starts sobbing*
What I can do is spend hours on end reading The Sneeze archives. This has got to count for somthing.
Love,
Phoebe

Posted by: Phoebe at September 7, 2006 3:06 PM

I can't roll my Rs or snap my fingers

I've never heard of not being able to wink...

It's easy!

*wink wink wink wink*

See?

D:

Posted by: Miranda at September 7, 2006 3:38 PM

OH, and I also can't touch my toes

Or run steadily for 2 minutes or more

I'M PATHETIC *sob*

:)

Posted by: Miranda at September 7, 2006 3:39 PM

ummm...I can't flex my left butt cheek.

what?

Posted by: ESC at September 7, 2006 5:18 PM

Is it weird that I can wiggle one ear, my right one, but not both or my left one?

Posted by: Terri at September 7, 2006 5:57 PM

I can't:
wiggle my ears, touch my tongue to my nose or growl like a cat (in my throat like Conan)

I can:
wink (both sides), lift one eyebrow (both sides), roll and twist tongue, cross all fingers on both hands at the same time (the 2 inside fingers cross over the 2 outside fingers), write with either hand (not as well L as R), write backwards (mirror image), pick things up w/ my toes, whistle 2 ways and with a blade of grass -- but not with my fingers, can do the vulcan sign and the opposite, rub my belly as I pat my head and vice versa (both sides).

Posted by: AES at September 7, 2006 5:59 PM

I can't:
wiggle my ears, touch my tongue to my nose or growl like a cat (in my throat like Conan)

I can:
wink (both sides), lift one eyebrow (both sides), roll and twist tongue, cross all fingers on both hands at the same time (the 2 inside fingers cross over the 2 outside fingers), write with either hand (not as well L as R), write backwards (mirror image), pick things up w/ my toes, whistle 2 ways and with a blade of grass -- but not with my fingers, can do the vulcan sign and the opposite, rub my belly as I pat my head and vice versa (both sides).

Posted by: AES at September 7, 2006 5:59 PM

I can't wink to save my life; however, I can..
raise my left eyebrow (but not my right), roll my tongue, whistle three different ways (none involving my fingers or grass..), i can touch my nose with my tongue, snap my fingers on both hands, and separate my fingers (into ring/pinkie and middle/pointer) with no problem...

my boyfriend cannot whistle, or snap his fingers...but he can wink and roll his tongue..

Posted by: christine at September 7, 2006 7:01 PM

in our family or four there are 3 eyebrow raisers. my 10 year olds eyebrows look completely botoxed when he tries to lift one...we found this out earlier this very afternoon. it's as if it were meant to be for this little discussion.
i can't flip my tongue over but my husband and both sons can do that.

Posted by: jani at September 7, 2006 7:05 PM

I have learned that many people cannot "cross" their eyes. These people are usually grossed-out by people who have the ability.

My mom is one of those people who cannot cross her eyes. She also cannot fold her tongue, rise her eyebrows independently of each other, spread her toes apart, touch her tongue to her nose, or wink on one side of her face; she just pointed out that she can cross her fingers without using her other hand (both index/middle and ring/pinkie at the same time, both hands).

I can do all of the things my mom can and cannot do with the exception of touching my tongue to my nose - my tongue is too short. I can cross my eyes and move them up and down at the same time - like a cartoon, I have met only one other peson who can do that and it was a five year old boy.

Posted by: midnightpeapod at September 7, 2006 7:37 PM

I can't whistle or snap my fingers.

Posted by: Ira Gaines at September 7, 2006 7:42 PM

I possess no talent for winking, I'm afraid, but wanking... I know wanking like the back of my hand.. the right hand, to be precise.

AH-HILH!!!

Posted by: Heywood Jadoome at September 7, 2006 8:19 PM

I can: Wink (either eye, allbetit with slight face scrunching), Roll my Rs, whistle, click my fingers (simultaniously with great ease), do the Vulcan "live long and prosper" thing, roll my tounge, cross my eyes.

Now for the slightly intresting bit: I can raise my eyebrows (only both), flare my nostrils and wiggle my ears. But only all at once. They're all connected I swear, if I try to do one, the other two follow. I think my skin is too tight to allow me to do only one.

I can't raise one eyebrow (I never thought it was a common ability), touch my nose with my tongue or do the cool two finger/finger thumb whistle, much to my distress.

I've also taught several people claiming they can't click there fingers how to. A lot of non-clickers are under the impression its your finger and thumb seperating that makes the noise. Its infact your finger making contact with your hand quickly that makes the noise, incase ya didn't know.

I had no idea any of my "skills" were so uncommon and will try my best to make the most of them!

Posted by: Ali at September 7, 2006 8:21 PM

I can't pop my thumb out of joint at will. It'll do that on it's own. I also couldn't do the vulcan thing until I learned the secret: you've gotta tape your fingers and walk around like that for about 30 min.

On the other hand (no pun intended) I can clap with one hand. Seriously. And I've never met someone else who could do it as well as I can.

Posted by: Maureen at September 7, 2006 8:48 PM

You know that thing you can do to pull back the side of your mouth to kind of make you look like you're smoking a cigar? I can only do that on one side. I must have some motor problem on my right side. When I talk, my mouth sort of moves assymmetrically.

Posted by: Angela at September 7, 2006 9:38 PM

I am double-jointed in six fingers. I can't taste a chemical in green vegetables that most people perceive as bitter. I can't whistle. I can't descend a flight of stairs unless I watch my feet. I can't say the words "not into temptation" consecutively without tripping over my tongue.

Posted by: Jonathan at September 7, 2006 9:53 PM

I can "sneer" by raising the muscle on the side of my nose so my upper lip raises, but only on the left side of my face.

It's a learned behavior. My dad always sneered at me, so I learned to sneer back.

Posted by: Rachel at September 7, 2006 10:04 PM

Can:

Whistle (marginally)
Roll my tongue
Raise left eyebrow
Raise both eyebrows at the same time
Wink with both eyes
Give the Vulvan greeting with both hands
Flare my nostrils
Wiggle my ears
Snap
Not taste the chemical thingy Jonathon mentioned
Cross my eyes
Spread my toes

Does this make me a mutant?

Posted by: Broad at September 7, 2006 10:12 PM

i would like to hold your website or more specifically your comment box for causing me extreme pain in my facial areas and fingers. while reading what people could or could not do i was physically trying them out. and all im left with is pain. but the results are remarkable. besides not being able to have a clover tongue, and whistle with fingers, i can so the other things almost naturally. but still the paiiiiiiiiinn

Posted by: srk at September 7, 2006 11:17 PM

I wish I could lift one eyebrow. I can crack all my toes, though.

Posted by: Another Rachel at September 7, 2006 11:42 PM

I can't roll my tongue but my boyfriend James can.

And I hate it 'cause he won't teach me how...

Posted by: la.agua.fresca - loves to wink! at September 7, 2006 11:52 PM

My housemate appears unable to wash, tidy, clean, yawn with his mouth shut, put anything away, close doors, empty bins, do any dishes, hoover..anything, or pay rent on time. All things I consider simple actions!

Posted by: Reverend Funk at September 8, 2006 2:14 AM

I can wink!!

BUT... I do do this really ugly thing with the side of my mouth when I do it... I look a bit like I'm desperate for a number 2!

Still, I can actually wink, so I voted yes!

;-)

Posted by: Krissy at September 8, 2006 3:35 AM

Oooh, and I forgot, I can fold my tongue up. I don't mean roll it, I can actually fold it in half, with the tip toward the back of my mouth!

I can't click my fingers (how easy should that be???)

I can't whistle properly either...

Or raise one eyebrow then the other without looking looking like a dingbat..

I'm pretty useless at all that stuff actually!

Posted by: Krissy at September 8, 2006 3:39 AM