May 26, 2004

Crouton's Theme

the domeMy friends and I recently grabbed lunch at The Arclight Cinema in Hollywood-- home of the famous Cinerama Dome. We didn't see a movie, we just stopped there to eat because located in this impressive theater is an actual restaurant with actual decent food.

We were all having a nice time, but shortly after my lunch arrived I was overcome by a strong sense of foreboding. I could just tell something was about to go wrong. Was it a premonition? A weird hunch? Was I experiencing some sort of extra-sensory perception?

No. It was the scary movie score they were playing in the background while I was trying to eat my fucking salad.

I appreciate the idea of movie soundtracks in a setting like this, but do they really have to play a tune better suited to Hannibal Lechter slurping down some dude's pancreas when I'm gnawing on my crouton?

The dark music reached its crescendo, and I was convinced the waiter was about to sneak up and stab me in the back of the head with a shrimp fork. Luckily the movie score then shifted to something relaxed and happy, so I knew everything was going to be okay.

Lunch was still good, but it was the most ominous salad I've ever had.

(On a side note, at one point the waiter happened to say the phrase "Caramel Corn." I think he jumped back about two feet when Steve and Eric immediately shouted at him, "Wait! What kind of corn did you say?!" For the record, he pronounced it: KARA-mel.)



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